TTTB Chapter 6: Lake of Stars

BPOV
“Come on. Let's go for a walk. We both need to hunt and I need to talk to you.”
I looked up at Jasper and nodded. I told Jake and Emmett we were going out to hunt and we'd be back, that we have our cell phones on us if needed, and put the numbers in Jake's newly acquired phone in case he and Emmett were separated for some reason. Jasper was waiting at the door, a small bag in hand, his eyes still dark from our trial earlier. I recalled Alice's note and stuffed a small blanket into my backpack and followed him. Our first stop was the woods from earlier, each of us quickly bagging dinner before he grabbed my arm and pulled me after him in silence. We reached the base of Pao de Acucar when he pulled a rope from his bag, looped it around his waist and did the same to my own. My confusion must have been overly strong as he turned and smiled. “Trust me. Let's climb. The view will be worth it.” I nodded and started to dig my hand into the rock, using my fingers to propel me higher. We reached the top after five or six minutes, inhuman strength and speed coming in handy.
“Jasper, it's beautiful!" The ocean surrounding us reflected the sky like a mirror, so that we were surrounded by stars. He unhooked the rope between us, coiling it back into the bag. I looked around and found a shallow hollow in the center of the clearing and spread out the blanket. Jasper looked at me questioningly, an eyebrow lifted along with a side of his mouth.
“Alice?”
I nodded, laughing. He pulled out a letter from her.
Jazzy, take her back up the mountain and apologize for being a dick, or rather for feeling with it. Sorry I can't be there to enjoy the view with the two of you, when you're done talking, toss the ashes you saved to the wind and let me scatter over the shopping district. I don't want to stay in a jar forever, love.
At the bottom, a portion was folded over with the note "For Bella's eyes only."
Bella, Aren't you glad you brought the blanket, it will make star watching more comfortable- you'll see a few shooting stars if you watch long enough. I know there's a lot you don't understand right now, but you will. Eventually. Don't be mad at my brother, he hasn't put all the pieces together yet. That's the good thing about being gone, he can't read my mind. I get one last grand game and no one knows the end but me. I hope you all have fun.
Now, go have your talk, get your guilt out of the way and go back to being a happy family. Love again, Alice.
“The Alice hath spoken. I guess we need to talk, about earlier.” Jasper put his fingers over my lips, stopping me. He pulled me down onto the blanket so we could watch the stars. We were seated beside one another, watching the moon rise.
“Let me start. I don't know exactly where or how to start except for, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have pulled away this afternoon. You're the only person who has an idea of what I'm going through, still feeling the blood lust that strongly. It's hard that you can ignore it after a handful of months when I'm older than all but Carlisle in our household and still find myself losing control. I was trying so hard for Alice, to be the man she wanted me to be, and I don't know if I can anymore. The call never gets easier to ignore, I guess we proved that on your birthday.”
“Jasper, you are that man. The draw for blood is hard on everyone. I chose this life, I've had you all supporting me from day one. You lived a life of blood drinking, a life of war, your body is used to the taste of humans so it's harder for you to commit to being vegetarian. I get it, the whole family gets it. We want you here. You can't leave us to go back with the others. We need you. We can't lose you too.” I was shouting at him, only inches from his body. “We need you. I... I need you.” I whispered the last words.
“You need me? Why?”
I knew we were on dangerous ground that no answer would be the right one. “You're my brother, my friend, family, more. I don't know what is happening anymore. You're the widower of one of my best friends and I don't know what to say to you to make it better. It hurts me, so I can't imaging how it hurts you to be without her. I feel awful that she's gone because of me. You were all fighting to save Renesmee and I worry that you and Emmett will never forgive me. It's my fault that you are without her. I want to make it better but there aren't any vampire rulebooks laying around of how to make an Empath stop hurting.” I put my head in my hands, blinking away the unshed tears, trying to keep them to myself.
“Bella. I don't blame you. We are family. We left to find a way to save Renesmee. Alice loved you, loved your daughter. She knew what we were doing from the start and I can only blame her for not staying away. I could never blame you. Don't feel guilt over this. Yes, it hurts; it feels as if my heart has been ripped out of my chest, leaving a permanent emptiness behind, but I'll heal over time. Time is all I have. I miss her so much. She completed me in a way so that I never knew what was missing until now. She knew everything about me and I feel like I knew nothing about her or what she wanted. All she wanted was to be happy and I did everything in my power to do that. We'd go shopping together whenever she asked- do you know how many times I sat on the couch at Victoria's Secret while she danced around the store? Whenever she had a new idea, I was the first to sign on to help. Hell, I helped trap you a few times so you couldn't get away from playing Bella Barbie with her. She always had so much energy, so much she wanted to do to make everyone have everything they wanted. I just wish her last days were spent at home with everyone around her. That we'd made it home just one day sooner to give her one last day with the family. I won't leave despite how hard this life is. She didn't want that for me; I don't think I want that for me. I need to be here to help you keep Edward from killing Jake through the years, I want to watch my niece grow, I want to watch you gain control of your thirst and have you help me with mine. I'll need help controlling my emotions well I think.” He chuckled, slipping his arm around my shoulders. “I believe had Emmett been human he'd have had a heart attack on the plane. I am sorry about that. I truly didn't know what was happening. Alice had suggested the game as an icebreaker and once the hormones started flowing I couldn't stop them. I'm not used to this life without her yet. I'm used to having an outlet, someone who can ground me out when the pheromones start flying. Someone to cool me down when my anger gets out of control. You were good at that today. Just your touch and quiet words were enough to calm me so that I didn't try and get an extra snack or toss Jake through the door. I thought for a while you would have too.”
Jasper pulled his knees up to this chest and wrapped his arms around his knees. While he spoke I kept thinking back to the basement at home, when he growled at Edward. “I can feel your confusion. You're good at that one. What do you want to know, Isabella?”
I turned so that I was facing him, my legs crossed, arms resting on them. “At home, after we found the first letter, when you were holding me, you growled at Edward. Why?”
He looked shocked for a moment as he scanned his memories of the past few weeks. “On some level, I was jealous.” He put his arm on mine as I tried to protest. “Let me finish. You were crying, something none of us can do. You were crying for my wife and as selfish as it was, at the moment it felt as if you were the only one who knew how badly I was hurting, that you cared enough to cry for her. When I took you into my arms, the pain let up just a little, as if you were taking some of my pain into you, lessening how intense it felt to me. When Edward grabbed you, you shrank back into yourself, pulling your shield back and I felt hollow again. I was jealous that he had you, when you could make me feel better. I was jealous that you still had each other when I was so alone, and I was jealous that he had you, period. You are an extraordinary woman, Bella.”
I looked down at my hands and then back at him. His face was breathtaking in the moonlight. I remembered why Edward was able to dazzle me so easily. I felt my brain melting into dazzled mush, looked away, and sighed. Not knowing how to argue with him when I'm here to make him feel better. I felt his hand glide up to stroke my hair back where some strands had come loose from my ponytail, and then slide down my cheek. Jasper whispered my name so softly I had a hard time distinguishing it from imagination or reality. I felt a soft wave of affection flow from his hand. He tilted my chin so that I was looking at him, I could see the stars reflected in his eyes. I was dazzled more thoroughly by that simple look than when he had unleashed his power previously.
"We can't do this, Jasper." He pulled me onto my side so that we were laying facing one another, I closed my eyes so that I couldn't see the emotions in his eyes. I felt his breath across my face. I knew by the feel of the air that he was millimeters from my lips. His hands went down my back and I felt him press his lips against my cheek, the corner of his mouth touching mine, and he let out a frustrated whine and pulled me onto his chest.
“You're right, I'm sorry. I'm saying that a lot.” He kissed my temple and started stroking the exposed skin where my shirt had ridden up on my back.
“Don't be sorry, Jasper. It's just that we can't. I won't hurt Edward like that. I love him. You know that. It's also not what you need right now. I don't know where it leaves us as I think we both want more and I think Alice knew this was going to happen and wanted it. She seems to keep throwing us together in hopes of fireworks.”
“You're right. I had a letter before the one the family found. I was holding it in the study when you came in. She told me the next person I saw would be the key to healing my broken heart. That I would love again and while it wouldn't be like how I loved her, that it would be enough to keep me from going back to my old life. I don't know where we are going but I don't think we can go back to how we were, siblings just in a house. Alice seems to know that more could or will happen and I don't think I want to stop it. If she hadn't wanted it, she'd have stopped it. I just want us all to be happy again and when I'm with you, the pain lets up a little. I'm not ready to love anyone else. I'll never love anyone the way I loved Alice, but you are different. I already loved you as my sister, as family, maybe that's enough to hold my heart together. I don't know what we're going to tell Edward although from the conversations I've overheard I think Marcus and Alice have been working on him in the same way. So it's up to you and Edward from here. But the two of you come first. I won't see the two of you hurting because I can't keep my hands and emotions to myself. Just please don't shut me out, at least always be my friend.” Jasper fell silent and pressed my head more firmly against his chest.
I whispered “always” against his collar bone, my lips tingling softly as they skimmed over his flesh. His hand tightened in my hair as he lifted his own head to kiss the top of my head. We laid there until the stars began to fade and the sky lightened. Jasper slid out from under me and pulled a dark red glass jar from his bag.
"Alice. I loved you more than my own existence, I will until my last hunt. Thank you for sharing the journey with me and be happy where ever you may be. To love, lust, companionship, endless shopping trips, and the annoying way I could never surprise you. My heart is with you, love. I'll live like you asked, so don't wait for me." He tossed a handful of ashes to the winds and then let the jar tumble down the side, shattering on impact, the red glass catching the faint glow and shimmering in the dawn light.
He held out a hand to me and we walked down the side of the mountain in silence except for his laughter as I fell down the last twenty feet.

TTTB Chapter 5: Reunion

BPOV
We hunted until nearly dawn, both boys not satisfied until I was practically sloshing when I walked. My legs felt fairly leaden as we walked back to our suite, each foot feeling as if it were a hundred pounds pulling at me. When asked, Emmett told me that he's never glutted himself to max capacity before but as bright as my eyes are, he thinks any more and I'd explode. The closest feeling I could remember this to was at a birthday party as a child and having eaten half of a party-sized double decker pizza by myself before topping it off with cake and ice cream. Renee made me eat some pink, vaguely mint tasting things to help keep me from throwing it all up. I giggled as I thought of her tending to my misery as I laid on the cold bathroom tile flooring.
“What so funny, munchkin?” Emmett was leading the way through the streets, constantly stopping to sniff for any approaching humans. So far a few on foot blocks away were all that he picked up and my thirst was satiated to the point I hardly felt the pull of human blood and stopped breathing until it was deemed safe. I tentatively took in a breath to speak, my remaining oxygen let out while laughing. It stung a little but nothing unbearable.
“Just a human memory of over eating and trying not to puke.” The boys looked at each other and laughed so hard they held onto each other to prevent falling. I think I heard the words “only Bella,” “stupid humans,” and “free entertainment” mixed in with their laughter. I'd have smacked their heads together but I was worried they'd retaliate and end up carrying me to the hotel while screaming as they tickled me, again. As it is, I don't know if the tamarins will return to that area of the jungle after Emmett started tickling as Jasper held me down, raising my hysterics until venom flowed out my eyes as I laughed, clutching my sides and tried to get them both off of me. My screeching echoed off the trees through the valley and made the boys tickle harder as they laughed. So I settled for a soft snarl and stalking off ahead of them as fast as I could go while looking human as they stood there laughing at me. Apparently they knew better and let me go off on my own to cool off as I had a few minutes for composure before they reached the hotel.
I pulled my suitcase out of the closet where I'd left it and grabbed the clothing set from the top, a pair of apple bottom jeans, white halter top with a silvery silk shrug. I was in the shower when I heard the boys return to our room. If it hadn't been for the fact that I knew the sooner I finished the sooner we could be on our way to Renesmee, I'd have stayed in long past the water running cold. I dried my hair in the bathroom, letting the boys sit in their hunt marred clothes and worry about what I was going to say when I stepped out. Getting ready to hold my daughter in my arms removed any lingering anger I had for Emmett and Jasper beyond the steady frustration they seemed to thrive on creating in me.
Rosalie and Alice had far more patience than I could ever gain for the sex jokes and emotional backlash the boys create. Once while Emmett was out on a hunt, Edward explained that Rosalie often used sex to keep Emmett quiet, so for his entire existence as a vampire his life revolved around having sex with Rose, thinking about sex with Rose, or making sexual innuendos- more recently at my and Edward's expense. Without his primary outlet, his sexual frustration was getting stronger each day- perhaps the main reason for Jasper's less than innocent turn of events on the plane.
Edward had called during the hunt while the boys were tickling me; Jasper grabbed my phone and after assuring Edward that I was quite alright but being tickled until I admitted Emmett was king, Jasper was told where my highly ticklish spots were in exchange for the promise of keeping me calm when we got home so I wouldn't exact revenge. If Edward thinks that there will be reunion sex, he's got another thing coming. He has a lot of things to answer for, including his less than forthcoming explanation of his thoughts regarding Alice and her messages. True, I didn't explain the airplane events completely, which I will, but preferably when Jasper is several miles away and I have Edward quite calm, and after a promise not to destroy anyone for what was an innocent game that ran awry. Things will be better once Renesmee is home. He'll be so pleased to have his little girl home that nothing else will matter, and hopefully all will be forgiven so we can go back to life and helping piece our family together as best we can.
I exited the bathroom and the boys both looked at me sheepishly, waiting for the yelling they expected, Jasper holding out a bunch of lilies while Emmett had a pair of woven sandals from the market. I walked past them, set my case on the bed and began repacking my clothes, letting the tense silence remain in the air. I folded my hunting clothes and placed them into the plastic sack Alice had provided in the top of my suitcase, a sack for each day plus two extras- I'm assuming in case we have any emergency hunts to clean up after. The boys stood watching me as I went to the desk in the front room and pulled out Edward and Carlisle's binder and reviewed our next hotel's location and best route along with Alice's note with the suitcases that we'd find Jake and Renesmee on the Sugar Loaf Mountain cable car.
“Aren't you going to say anything?” Emmett's voice boomed through the room, obviously more loudly than he had planned based on his wince. Jasper had one eyebrow arched while watching me, obviously trying to discern what I was feeling and being a tad confused at my lack of overt anger. Frustration yes, anger no.
“Not about the two of you getting my husband to turn traitor and holding me down while making me scream. I do want you to get your butts in gear and clean up so we can go get Renesmee once the weather permits. We also need to discuss who will stay with Jake and Ren while we hunt. I know that you want me hunting every night so I will, but we should probably alternate who stays behind. Jake will most likely want to have a turn at babysitting me and you will allow it, you owe me that after earlier. Are we clear?” I looked at each of them before spinning on my heel and heading back to the bed to stretch out and relax until they were ready. I could overhear whispering followed by a thunk and Emmett swearing while Jasper shoved him towards the bathroom.
“I really am sorry, Bella” his southern gentleman twang entering his voice as he purposely tried to dazzle me. He held the flowers out as a peace offering. I couldn't stay irritated despite my best intentions and cracked a small smile before sitting up. “Friends?” he offered.
I stood up and wrapped my arms around Jasper. “More than friends, we're family. Even if you are a jerk at times, I still love you, Jasper” I inhaled his scent, more cinnamon and spice than Edward's sweet smell, but entrancing nonetheless. He chuckled and tightened his arms around me.
“You smell good too, sis.” He swatted me on the ass before sitting me down on the bed. Emmett came out wrapped in his towel “What about me, someone tell me I smell good. Don't leave me out of the love!”

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Jake POV
We had been in Rio a week when I started smelling traces of bloodsuckers. I kept Nessie with me at all times, it was safer for her to encounter a vampire with me than on her own. It was only when we went through the forest preserve during our second week that I smelled Bella. Her strawberry shampoo and the smell that was simply Bella clung to the cloying burning smell the leeches leave behind. Nessie was clinging to my back, piggyback carries being her favorite mode of transportation lately.
“Hey, short stuff. I think today we need to play a game, are you up for it?” Nessie raised her hand to my cheek. Game? I like games! What kind? Jake, my Jake. Tell me what game! “Well, I was thinking of a game of hide 'n' seek if you think we're up to it. We need to find three people in town. I just don't know who they are yet, exactly. Well, I know who one of them is, but the other two I'm not completely sure on. So basically, your part in the game is to see if you can spot or smell anyone you know besides the hotel staff and the woman at the market that gave you the dolly. I think we might go up to Pao de Acucar for some sightseeing plus since it's such a high vantage point, we should have better views of the city, perhaps see our prey of the day. What do you say, Nessie?”
The images she gave showed following me through the city, through a desert, over a mountain, and even into a rolling surf. “Anywhere Jake. I'll follow you anywhere.” My Jake. Mine. I turned my head to look at her, her chin settled on my shoulder. Nessie was looking straight ahead and started sniffing the air. She leaned her head into me, released a hand from my neck to smell it, and pulled on me to make me turn around. Another sniff. She'd smelled it too. She stopped, her legs tightening around my back as she kept twisting her head back and forth, questions crossing her chocolate eyes. She showed herself smelling the air, an image of me in wolf form following a trail, and then Bella. Mama. I smell Mama. Hunt now, Jake. Find Mama. Find another sniff Find Uncle Jasper. Maybe Emmett, not Daddy. Want Daddy! She reached up and pulled my hair as if to prove a point.
She can speak perfectly well, and looks as if she were five years old, but speaks and communicates as if she were an adult. Her mental communication is via images and senses, not so much specific words. When Nessie wants something, she slips back into her childish demands and pleas as well as hair pulling and biting. At least it doesn't sting, just hurts for a moment before healing over. She thinks it's funny that she can bite me, and well, if she enjoys it, I'll let her do it. I'm here to look over her, Bella's daughter. I know why it doesn't hurt anymore to think of Bella, but it's odd not loving her like that anymore. Bella was my everything since I was a little cub wandering the reservation, tagging along on Dad and Charlie's fishing trips; she was my summer princess. Then she stopped coming and had only come back into my life before being ripped away.
Maybe vampires imprint like we do and that's what happened to her. While he was gone, things had been going so well once she opened up and then she ran off to save him and I knew she was lost to me forever when they came back together. And then she kissed me, really kissed me, but it wasn't enough. Then they married and brought Nessie to me.
Renesmee? What was Bella thinking? She almost ripped my throat out when I called her Nessie for the first time in front of her. I wonder if that was my draw to her even as children, the egg that became Nessie was inside of her begging me to watch over her mom until she was conceived and born. Now I must wait until she's old enough to love me the way I loved her mother, the way her parents love one another. At least I don't have to wait as long as Quil does for Claire. The guests the pixie brought back said that Nessie will grow until she's seventeen or eighteen and then stop, staying there for as long as she exists. I guess I won't be giving up on phasing until I have to. Fate's a cruel mistress having a werewolf imprint on a leech, even a partial leech, but Nessie is the center of my world.
I am humbled by Bella's trust in me with Nessie, trusting me to leave the country with her, to keep her safe. These days have been filled with unshed tears, worries that my best friend was finally lost to me forever. Coming across her scent revived a part of me I didn't know I'd lost. She's here, looking to find us. I didn't know how things have changed, or why I couldn't smell Edward with her. What will she do if those Italian guys toasted him? I can't be there like I was before, well I can, but not in the same way I was before and I think it would confuse Nessie if I were.
Nessie is my life, my future wife if she'll have me, but Bella is... Bella is my best friend and we have a history that no one can take away. I felt a smile twitch across my face when I thought of kissing her at home and then taking her home to put ice on her hand. She was so beautiful when pissed at me. I think I kissed her in part because I wanted to see that fire. I hope that her daughter has kept that human fire as well as Bella's beautiful eyes. I'm glad those were saved. It's like having the best parts of her saved just for me, meant for me. I hope that her family has been good to her if Edward is gone. I don't know how the pack would take it, but I'd have her and Nessie live with me if need be. It would make for some grand confusion but we'd take things a day at a time.
Nessie touched her hand to my cheek, wrinkling her nose. Scratchy. You need to shave and cut your hair. She showed me a picture of me phased with my fur dragging the ground. She tried to look serious but a small giggle escaped her lips and she began shaking with laughter. I took off on a jog, following the scent as best I could, following the forest edge until my nose burned more on the trail coming from town. I made the turn which led to a hotel, reaching it as a soft rain started to fall down on us.
“Before making fun of me, what were you going to ask Ness?”
What were you thinking about? Images of my face as I was thinking, twitches of smiles and sadness crossing my face.
“I'm just worried about your mom and very thankful that she's here. Let's go find her.” Renesmee pulled my ponytail so my head was tilted back and she kissed my cheek. Thank you, my Jake. My Jake. Always my wolf.
We walked into the lobby and approached the main desk. She looked at us questioningly and I did my best to remember my high school Spanish- the whole one semester of it I'd taken. I gave up. “Do you speak English?” The girl shook her head and held up one finger as she went to find someone who could help us. She came back smiling with a small boy, maybe fourteen or fifteen years old.
“I speak English, how can I help?”
I explained that I was looking for the Cullens, a pretty brunette American and most likely her husband. He looked back at the girl and translated for us. She looked through some paperwork on the desk and typed a few things on the computer. “Bella?” My smile must have been answer enough as she said something quickly to the boy. “Are you Jacob and Vanessa Wolfe?” I nodded and he grinned. “Mister Jasper left a note for you.” He handed it to me, but I had no chance of reading the Spanish.I looked at it apologetically. He took it back and scanned it quickly. “It looks like your friend and her brothers are waiting for you- they said they'd meet you where you were planning on going and Edward will pick you all up at the airport when you return home.” Edward didn't come with? He let her go without him? I know I took off as soon as Alice fell but still, he'd let her go with Emmett and Jasper? What about Rosalie? I mean, I'm grateful to not deal with her in a plane but I don't see her letting Emmett out of her sight now that Nessie is safe. I wonder if she too fell beneath the Volturi... The family ripped to shreds for my clumsy best friend. All she did was love someone she shouldn't have.
“Thank you for everything. I guess we'd best be on our way. Come on, Vanessa.” I slung Nessie back up onto my shoulders. Her hands tightening around my neck. I'm not Vanessa, Jakey. Just because the papers say so doesn't mean you have to call me that. Her nails pressed into my cheek.“Okay, okay I get it, Nessie. I guess we're headed up to the mountain, same as before." They seemed to know where we were going.

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B POV
We waited in line as long as we could, climbing into the car and spreading out so that our dense forms didn't tip the tram more than necessary. The rain was pelting down around us, no one but us and a few college students, most likely on winter holiday, were sightseeing today. The wind whipped the cable car, rocking it against the movable stairs the assistant had placed. Then I got the first scent I wanted. Jake! I looked out into the rain and saw him running towards us, a head of bronze hair like her father's showing over his either picked up the scent or noticed my excitement and stood up, joining me, holding the door open so that the guide couldn't send us on our way quite yet. Jake's legs sprinted across the concrete, straining at running as quickly as he could without breaking any known world records. The students saw that we were watching someone and stood to watch.
“Bella!” I heard his shout and could see him trying to hurry, the cable car guide getting impatient at Jasper's refusal to leave the platform. Then he was in front of me, climbing the stairs, my dear Renesmee jumping from his back and into my arms. She reeked of him, smelled of wet dog, but it was my girl, here in my arms after too long. I showered her in kisses, blowing my sweet breath over her in much the way Edward had often done to me, masking the scent she'd picked up. She raised her hand tentatively before I grabbed it, pressing it against my cheek. Renesmee's thoughts were a mess, trying to tell me everything all at once.
I saw them running through the woods, finding a car at the edge of the woods with a note attached, “For Jacob,” and a ribbon holding the key. Driving to the airport, taking several planes, going for the fastest route out of the states but still trying to confuse any followers by taking many short trips sometimes in directions opposite what they needed. Finally getting to Rio, finding a cheap but clean hotel to stay in, hunting in the woods together, going to restaurants together, shopping for clothes, playing in the fountains and in the ocean, going for a walk this morning and picking up my scent, Jasper's hurried note left at the desk in case they came looking for us, running all the way here in hopes of making it in time. Seeing me and her uncles. Daddy? Where's Daddy? Where's Aunt Alice? Auntie Rose? Why didn't everyone come? Oh Mommy, I missed you. Jake missed you too.
She showed me pictures of Edward, Alice standing in front of Aro and then Jake whipping around and running out of the clearing before she could see anything more, pictures of Rose holding her as a baby...I started crying, the tears burning my cheeks. Happiness of my reunion warred with the pain my brothers, my whole family felt at losing my sisters. I'd never had sisters and to lose them like that was unfair. We were all supposed to have our happily ever after. Jake pulled Renesmee from my arms, handing her off to Emmett before wrapping his arms around me. He shook with his own tears, mine eating holes in his shirt. He hissed as one hit his bare skin.
“Tears? A crying leech? Only you, Bella.” He laughed, rubbing the skin where my venom had reached before rubbing my tears with a handkerchief he pulled from his pocket. He sat down, pulling me next to him, his arms feeling hot, too hot, around me. I cringed from the discomfort and smell but leaned against him, gathering strength from him as always. “I missed you, Bells. Even if you stink.” He smiled into my hair and watched Renesmee with Emmett and Jasper, laughing and playing with them at the other end of the car. The students looked confused, three pale Americans, wearing sunglasses in the rain; a tall, well built American Native with his hair past his shoulders in a ponytail, and a little girl who was more beautiful than any child model or actress, and all of us apparently together in some fashion. Two of the girls were swooning over my brothers while the other shot dirty looks my way for curling up into Jake's side. I knew he looked good but he was my future son-in-law, my best friend- only those things. So I giggled and turned my face towards him, murmuring quietly.
“They think we're together. If they only knew. Oh Jake. I missed you. Thank you for everything, for keeping her safe. I knew you would, only you could. I guess we're back to the lifetime of servitude now. Human lifetime or more?”
He laughed and kissed my cheek. “So Bells... where is he? I don't smell him here. I didn't think he'd let you leave his sight. What's up? What did I miss?” I knew that question wasn't far behind. I looked to Jasper, not knowing how to answer. His eyes went hollow, he'd heard the questions as clearly as I had. He was still talking to Renesmee, telling her about the treehouse they were going to build when we were back home- a huge tree palace for her. Her giggles sounded like the child she'd become while away. Jake noticing me watching. “I took pictures of her every day so you could see the changes. For that scrapbook you guys had started. So are you going to tell me or do I need to ask them?” I sighed and tried to collect my thoughts.
“They're gone. Alice you saw, when Aro pulled her back. We didn't have a chance to save her. There were traitors on our side, the Egyptians. How they hid their thoughts from Edward I'll never know- Aro and Caius must have gotten to them before they came to us at witnesses. Benjamin murdered Rose. The Denali clan lost two sisters. All the Volturi guards fell, only Marcus remains because he surrendered to Edward and Carlisle accepted. Edward had to stay behind to help with Marcus, to be his guard so to speak. He's constantly scanning Marcus's thoughts for any further betrayals. Marcus wants to disband the Volturi and then live out his existence in quiet exile. I think we may have to go with to ensure his actions but we wanted to bring you and Renesmee home first. Our plane leaves in four days; we thought we could enjoy a small vacation, a break from the sadness, before returning home to pick up the pieces.”
Jake's arm tightened around me and he was watching my brothers. He whispered his apologies, tears freely flowing. “I don't know what I'd do if lost Nessie or you. I can only imagine what they're going through.” He pulled me closer so that I was molded against his side, when Jasper's control slipped. The human smell was building from the rain and the burn had started growing in me so I knew Jasper felt it as well. He was stalking towards our end of the car, closer to the group of twenty-somethings. “Sit down Jasper. Stay with Bella.” Jake stood, putting his hand on Jasper's shoulder, ignoring the low hiss and pushed him towards me.
Jake saw it in his eyes too.
Jake slid into a seat between us and the humans. Not a smart place for a werewolf to be, our combined strength could rip him apart if we lost our grasp on the monster inside. He kept his voice low and calm towards us. “Guys, we've just got another minute, two at most, until we reach the top. Hold it together. If not for them and yourselves, for Nessie. She won't want to see that. I”ll throw you out the door if I have to but you need to get a grip. I know you just went out this morning so you can't be hungry already.” Jasper's hands began to twitch on the seat, I could see that his eyes were darkening behind his glasses. “Bella, calm him down. Emmett, I need you to come over here with Nessie and sit beside me. I can't do this on my own- we've got a possible meltdown coming and I don't think the clean up would be pretty.” I had stopped breathing as soon as Jake took a place of authority. He was an Alpha and he used that voice to take control of the situation. I understood a little of why an Alpha cannot be refused. He was calm but firm, Jake left us no room to disobey or he would take care of things in his way. He was protecting humans, what his kind were made for, and in this space us being vampires took precedence over us being friends. “Jasper. Hold your breath; I know you can. Do it, man.”
I took Jasper's hand in my own and started rubbing small circles on it, tracing a few of his scars with my fingertip, until he looked at me. I tried to think of anything calming, the warm water at Isle Esme, okay bad idea... I could feel the edge of his anxiousness slipping as he felt that tingle of lust before I started thinking of other things. I thought of the woods, the evenings Jasper and I spent reading, the calm I felt while laying in the meadow watching the clouds, my love for Edward and Renesmee, and I finally felt a tentative wave of calm emanate from him. I let it wash over me, calming every fiber in my body and focused on that feeling and Jasper finally relaxed, his hand uncurled from mine just as the tram squealed to a stop. We let the humans exit the car and sat there for a minute before Jake and Emmett looked at each other and then us before nodding. I stood up, pulling Jasper with me, scooped up Renesmee in my arms and went out onto the pile of cement that looks like something more out of a videogame than a tourist attraction. I focused on Nessie and watching her enjoy the view of the ocean and city beneath us. We stood, overlooking the city until after the college kids had left and we saw a tram empty itself of tourists. Jake tilted his head, issuing us back inside. He closed the door and we took a rather more comfortable ride down the mountain. Jasper was staying far away from me though. Once we'd gotten out on top of Sugar Loaf Mountain, he had kept as far from me as possible. I wonder if he's still embarrassed by my ability to shut down my senses and run away or in this case, hold my breath and focus until I could breathe again? If he wanted to be alone, I'd leave him alone; there was no sense in upsetting him more.
While I pondered the current state of Jasper, I heard Jake and Emmett discussing further lodging. His hotel was being paid daily as he had not been sure of his next step. He'd been dragging his feet about leaving the city but they'd exhausted all of the interesting things in the first week. Emmett said we'd take a detour to their hotel to pick up their belongings and head to our next suite. We have a new hotel, closer to the airport but still with an easy path to the the woods. Emmett told Jake about the golden lion tamarins, making Jake laugh and smack Emm on the back. It warmed me to see them getting along, my three brothers? I wonder if that's how Jake would fit into my life now, as my brother. As a son would be difficult but as a brother I could manage. His presence on the plane ride home would certainly keep Jasper's games in line.
We made it through the town, each of us carrying some of Renesmee and Jacob's bags. Jasper was still staying as far from me as he could. My recollection of events must have hurt him, I'd just have to let him be. I got them all settled in and ran a bath for Nessie. I searched my suitcase for something that would work as bubble bath when I felt the rather obvious bottle of Mr Bubble at the bottom of my case. Attached was a note in Alice's neat script. For my little Nessie, a bubble bath to wash away the werewolf stink. Love Auntie Alice. PS. Bella- take a blanket with you tonight...
Jake ordered room service for himself and Renesmee. I called Edward from the bathroom and let him talk to Renesmee while she played in the bubbles. He mentioned again that Marcus was giving him a lot to think about and just begged me to go along with whatever happens. That we can discuss everything at home, that he loves me more than anything and knows we'll get through everything. He told me how many more minutes until I was back in his arms and said he'd call in the morning after I've had another night of hunting that Emmett had already told him of the potential problem while I ran Nessie's bath.
I watched Nessie dress herself in her nightgown, the cotton draping down to her knees, the blue ribbon at the neck so sweet, so innocent, belonging to a girl not born into the eternal life like my little girl was. Not so little anymore though.. I brushed her waves out, having been without a good brushing since she left home, happy that Jake at least made her bathe daily and brush her teeth each night before bed. I watched her eat supper and then tucked her in for bed, stroking her hair back out of her face and kissing her forehead. I sang the song Renee used to sing to me
“Dearest Duckling, Close your eyes, Crickets chirp your lullabies, Daddy duck is swimming near, Turtles you need never fear, Go to sleep my downy one, Moon is shining, Day is done.”
Renesmee looked up at me, smiling sleepily. I love you mommy. I'm glad we found you again. I missed you so much. We can go shopping tomorrow. Then I can show you the parks and maybe go for a movie... and then we'll go see Daddy... and uncle Emmett said...she showed me an image of Edward building a room onto the cottage and Jake flopping down onto the bed in it and uncle Jasper... tree house... and then she was out. I sat there, holding her hand against my cheek as I had done when she was so tiny, watching her dreams. Now they were of Jake and running through the woods on his back, how he held her close, called her short stuff, of Edward and me holding her on the couch, of Esme and Carlisle, of Alice and Rose. I know she heard me talking to Jake even if she didn't let me know she did. She hears as well as any of us do. I was pulled from watching her sleep, the closest I'd ever get to it again, by Jasper's hand on my shoulder.
“Come on. Let's go for a walk. We both need to hunt and I need to talk to you.”

TTTB Chapter 4: Rio's Golden Demons

EPOV
The drive home was uneventful and gave me time to think. This was the first time I'd been separated from Isabella since I'd left her. My body did not shut down as badly as before, though I knew the hole in my chest would not heal until she was in my arms again. I could only hope that Jasper and Emmett could keep Bella from feeling the same despair. At least she had to keep moving to find our daughter; all I have here is hunting and playing babysitter for the remaining Volturi.
Marcus had some interesting thoughts he had shouted at me when we were in the basement. His laughter had echoed through the hall as he privately told me, “The seeds have been sown, Edward, the seeds have been sown.”
A discussion was in order once I returned home; first Jasper growling at me and then Marcus's cryptic thoughts. All I want is my family pieced back together and some semblance of happiness returned. Home first, then I can search out the answers I need to all my questions. I turned up the volume on Debussy and let the Volvo's engine purr as I sped towards home.
I must have lost myself completely in the music as I was soon shutting off the car in the garage and I couldn't remember most of the drive, my internal auto pilot having taken over for most of the drive as my brain was lost in thoughts of Bella. Six days... Alice said six days... I can make it that long, I think. The front door had a note in Esme's scrawl saying they were out on a hunt, with Marcus, and to join them when I returned. I figured that it wouldn't hurt even though it had just been a few hours- I hadn't had much as I was too caught up in watching Bella satiate her thirst. The monster reared its head at the thought of blood so I shrugged out of my jacket and started running before leaping the river into the woods. I picked up my parents' scents along with that of Marcus and trailed them to their hunt. The three were seated on a log, all looking glutted on blood. I nodded to them and took off on the trail of a mountain lion that had escaped them earlier. The mountain lion folded within my arms, she'd seen me attack here before and knew that escape was futile. I drank from her before placing the carcass beneath a boulder- cleaning up as I was taught or “doing the dishes,” as Emmett was known for saying before Esme scolded him for being crass. I wiped the dirt from my hands and flitted through the trees back to where Carlisle, Esme, and Marcus awaited me. Their thoughts were reaching to me before I could see them through the trees.
I'm glad he went hunting, I don't like to see my son hurting. All my boys are hurting. Esme's thoughts were maternal; her mothering goes beyond any of her physical needs. Good, they're off to bring back Nessie so we can get some semblance of normalcy again.
Carlisle's thoughts reached out to me at the same time. Edward! Welcome home. I know this is less than pleasant being separated from her, but you do see my point. We need you here to help with Marcus. He said that you and he have to discuss some things in private. I tilted my head down towards my feet before tilting to see Marcus- a move my family has long understood to be a nod as I took part in their silent conversation before ending it.
It was Marcus's thoughts that gained my interest. You finally let your pet away. You know it will never be the same again. One already is falling in love with her, and the other won't be far behind. If you fight it, the family will fall apart.
“The prodigal son returns. Edward, I'm glad you're joining us!” Marcus's voice scratched through the air to me, nails on chalkboard was too kind a simile for the sound. “I assumed your brooding nature would return and my dear friends Esme and Carlisle were worried you would not even leave the airport despite your need here as my guardian.” Do my thoughts trouble you, young one? I've seen many relationships in my years and none rival what you and your Isabella have. Her devotion to you is complete and unchanging- nothing, no one, could ever take her from you. But you will have to share her heart with your brothers if the Cullens are to remain more than a coven. Wouldn't it be better to share her with two you know won't steal her away in the night; two men you feel honored to share the word “brother” with, two men that would worship her as you do?
“Enough! I've heard enough!” The words were out before I could think, a growl growing in my chest. “She's mine. I waiting a century for her. This discussion is over.” Esme was on her feet, headed my direction when the tree I was touching shattered beneath my hand.
“Edward, what is it? What did he say? I'm assuming this is about Bella. Of course she's yours. She'll be home in under a week, you can hold it together until then. Bella would never leave you, she's just away to get your daughter- yours and her daughter- the daughter she risked everything for to bring into this world. You are her reason to exist, keep your mind in one piece for her.” Her thoughts echoed her words, a few changes here and there as she edited for me.
“It will be alright, Mom. You're right.” I knew calling her mom would calm her down, it always does. “It's just a few days and in comparison to the years before she was in my life, six days are a good trade for the eternity awaiting us. Our guest,” as I cringed at the word, “has some ideas I'm not fond of and do not wish to repeat at the moment. When Carlisle doesn't need me I want to work on some blue prints for you to add on a room to the cottage. Bella and I were talking before, after this trip, Nessie and Jake are not going to tolerate the 20 miles or so it is to La Push and now that the treaty is effectively null and void in relation to land due to the Pack's promise to support any imprinting, we think Jacob should at least have a room in our home for when he's here late.” We think? Or just Bella thought and you're agreeing to it? Esme's eyebrow arched at me while I was talking. “Okay, yes. Bella thought.. Well, demanded rather. I think she was coming up with things to keep me busy while she's gone and more to worry about than what trouble she'll find that far away from me.”
I took off through the woods to our cabin to get some changes of clothing while at the house and start getting ideas for the addition. Some sketches, and a shower later, I found myself in my bedroom, holding a note from Alice that was taped inside the wardrobe box I had pulled out to pack for my stay in my old room.
Edward- I see you've found another letter. I know Bella's gone to get Renesmee- please toss all the clothing she buys before she can hang it in your closet. I cringed having to watch her buy it, I don't want to see it in the closets too. Don't miss me too much brother. Don't let Jazzy go, although I think he's tied to the family in ways neither of you will understand for a while yet. Marcus is right, it will help. I've seen you being happy again- all of you. At least listen to him and see what happens, don't force the cards to lie as you wish or you will reopen old wounds and rub salt in new ones. Just trust me. She loves you but the ability to love is not finite. Sharing her love does not make her love you less, she'll love you more for letting her love them. Yes them. I know it will not be easy but you'll see, it will all work out in the end, Eddie. You left your cellphone at the main house, you'd best head back and get it. She'll be calling you in seventy minutes when they land and are on a layover. Tell Bella I'm sorry I switched out the batteries but there's no need to thank me, I know the game was fun. Emmett is keeping them in check and they are having one last snack before leaving the plane. They'll be fine. Oh and when the plane lands bringing them all home, tell them to hold their breath and get them to the car quickly. The coffee cart...
Your annoying little sister, Alice
PS. Don't punch the wall, it didn't do anything to you.
I laughed in spite of myself. Of course she'd seen me crumbling her note and taking out my frustration on the bedroom wall. It seems that my psychic of a sister is going to play matchmaker to spite me. Sharing Bella with Jasper and Emmett? Are they crazy? I finally have my mate and they want me to share?
Alice wouldn't ask me if she didn't find it important. Jasper is all that we have of Alice. She wants us to take care of him, keep him here in the family. What future awaits him otherwise? And Emmett? He couldn't really think of his “little sister” like that could he? Of course he could. They're men. Even I could feel the urges to mate even while I spurned all female advances in my direction.
If this is the only way to hold the family together, could I do it? Would I do it? I can't talk to my parents- they have enough to worry about. If we join with Eleazar and Carmen as well as Kate and Garrett, we would likely be the force to reckon with now that the Volturi are gone. The largest grouping of talents in one family. If we lose my brothers, we would only be a coven, no longer a family despite Esme's efforts.
Could I let them have a part of her that only I have had? Could I deal with their thoughts? Would she even agree to it? If I asked her to, she would. If I told Isabella it was the only way to keep the family together, she'd do it. But would she want to? Do I want to know if she wants to? I have six days to think it through. Perhaps a talk with Marcus is in order. My world is about to change again and I am not in control this time.
I don't want her to get hurt. I'd leave with her and Nessie before it came to that. Dammit Alice, meddling from the other side. Damn meddling pixie.
I tossed one of Bella's recently worn sweaters into the box so that I could keep her scent on me during her absence. Perhaps smelling the sweater while speaking on the phone will take the ache away.

---

BPOV
The batteries in my iPod died before we had been in the sky an hour. Emmett decided to provide our entertainment by making fun of Edward. Jasper decided I wasn't loosening up enough and turned it into a game of manipulating Bella's emotions. I went from laughing to tears in 30 seconds flat. Emmett and I then decided a game of resisting Jasper could be fun. He'd warn us of the emotion and give us five seconds to prepare before the onslaught. I managed to hold off of happiness by thinking of the cliche dead puppies, but that only worked for a moment before I saw Emmett's goofy grin and I fell over my feet laughing.
Jasper then told us “lust,” and I started thinking of my grandparents having sex and it must have been working; I felt nothing. I'm guessing that laughing in Jasper's face was not the most mature reaction, but Emmett seemed amused. Jasper however got the last laugh, or maybe it was Emmett, anyone but me.
“Jasper, I think you're losing your touch.” I set a hand on his shoulder while giggling at his pout. Then I felt the tingle. “Oh my...”
“Yes, Bella?” His lips twisted up into a smirk as his eyes took on a gleam I haven't seen in weeks. His hand settled onto my hip while he flooded the cabin with lust. I could feel my arousal rising and knew that both of them could smell me.
“Is something the matter, little sister?” His hand tightened on my hip as the waves of sex poured through me. My eyes rolled back in my head, and if I hadn't been sure of his hand on my hip and the other on my arm, and that my ears registered Emmett still seated five feet away, I would have thought I was being touched. The pressure was building on my clit as if being stroked. I opened my eyes to see him smiling and the waves ebbed and flowed, crashing over me until I could feel my body clenching, ready for a mind blowing orgasm, moans and pants coming from my lips, when it stopped. I crumpled to my knees, my body denied what it needed, with no release coming for a week.
“Jasper!” I hissed between my teeth when I could get enough air in my lungs to speak at all.
“Do you need something, Bella? I didn't touch you. Did I, Emmett?” We both turned to look at a rather shocked Emmett. If a vampire could flush, he would have been; his jaw hung slack, his eyes glazed over, and his pants hid nothing of his reaction to the scene and emotions. “Emmett? Was that too cruel? I guess Edward did tell me to take care of her.” His face blanked to show no emotion as he looked into my eyes, topaz much like my beloved's meeting my now rusty orange eyes, as he unleashed his gift quickly, a scream leaving my lips as my back arched, my orgasm rushing through me. I collapsed back against the ground and could hear Emmett swearing, no doubt needing to use the restroom to clean himself up if he was getting as strong a dose of Jasper's talent. Jasper's smile returned as he offered me a hand up. I pulled him down on top of me instead. He looked surprised as I flipped us over so I was sitting across his stomach.
“If you do that ever again without my permission, I will see that you are separated from your little friend here and don't find it anytime soon.” Jasper's only response was to grab my hips and push me back so that I could feel his hardened cock against me.
“You weren't the only one affected, Bella. You enjoyed it, Emm enjoyed it, and I enjoyed it. No one was hurt here. You're embarrassed that anyone could evoke that from you but Edward. It's just sex, a release. Lighten up. Stop it. Right now. I can feel your guilt. This game was Alice's idea. She knew what it would turn into. She figured you'd need it. Based on Emmett's panic in the bathroom right now, I'm pretty sure I'm the only one who didn't get off here.” Jasper bucked his hips against me as he spoke. The sensation against my already blood filled genitals elicited another moan from deep in my throat as I slid against him. “I can feel your desire. I won't take you, not without Edward's permission, although we both want it. You're curious of what it would feel like if I am touching you. And I assure you, I'm not little.”
I couldn't speak. Feeling his erection through the denim pressing against me had my own arousal building again and I knew he wouldn't take me that far. The guilt of what Edward would think, of my own thoughts about my brother-in-law consumed me. But beyond that was the lust for the gorgeous scar covered blond boy beneath me who wanted me. Lust rolled off us both and he hissed as I rubbed against him. My hips rocked, trying to get as close as we could allow, while his gift played us both. I pressed harder into him until his breathing became erratic and the jolt of his hips lifted him and I clear from the ground. I traced my hands up from his arms where they had been resting to his chest, pressing slightly for leverage as my hips mimicked the acts I'd performed with Edward but at an angle he'd never allowed. Jasper didn't find me too fragile as he thrust his jean clad crotch against me, desperate for the friction I was providing. I thought of every sexual act I could, and dwelled in the lust and want that filled me. Jasper groaned and his hips ground against me as his fingers pulled at the pockets of my pants, twisting in the fabric, tearing it slightly before letting go.
His own need sated, Jasper's face slid back into the blank depression he'd had since Alice's death. “I'm sorry, Bella. I don't know what came over me. The hormones just took over and I lost control of everything.” I climbed into his lap and put an arm around him.
“It'll be okay; we'll figure things out. We can talk about this later.” It was then that Emmett stepped out from the front of the plane and reentered our cabin area. I kissed Jasper's cheek before settling into the seat next to him.
“Ummm. Yeah. The pilot dude says that we'll be landing in a half hour. So if you can not do that thing again with making me want to fuck Bella silly at least until we're off a moving object two thousand feet above the ground, the pilots would probably appreciate it.” He stepped over to the fridge and pulled out the last bag Carlisle had sent. “Last call at the bar. Let Bartender Emmett satisfy your thirst.”
Jasper let out a tentative smile and exhaled his held breath as I cracked up laughing at the change the three of us had made in the past few hours in the air. We spent the next half hour giggling about how this year was a great vintage for mountain lion but not so much on bear. I made Emmett promise to take me bear hunting when we got home, to which he readily agreed but said we'd leave Jasper behind as he doesn't want to “hump an irate grizzly because my brother thought it would be funny.”
I walked between the boys, each with an arm around my waist and our carry-ons in arm, while the stewardess we'd banished to the cockpit assured us our luggage was already transferred to the next jet. Other passengers in the terminal looked at us strangely, our long pants, long sleeves and sunglasses worn indoors in Mexico. We quickly made our way to our next plane's terminal and snagged seats away from the windows for our layover. Emmett went off to find more batteries for my iPod and Jasper played with the emotions of people waiting. Emmett returned with an entire bag of batteries, a selection of magazines, and some snacks- for keeping up appearances- while a group of teen girls on their holiday break sitting across from us were swooning as he passed them. When he sat next to me the girls audibly sighed, one so much as groaning and muttering “what's so special about her,” which had both guys laughing. I excused myself to go call Edward and let him know we were to the airport safely.
“Bella?” He picked up on the first ring as if he'd been holding the phone waiting.
“Yes, love. We're in Mexico City; all is safe. Our next plane is here and will be boarding in a little while. I miss you”
“I miss you more than words can express. Are the boys behaving?”
“Behaving? Like always Edward. You know how they are.” I hoped I'd covered my shock. He can't read minds that far can he? But hearing his voice made the ache in my chest stop. “I'm not leaving again, love. It hurts too badly to be parted from you.”
“And I from you, my love. Things are interesting here. I found another letter from Alice. She left me, or rather us, some things to think about and discuss when you're safely home in my arms. My Bella, these days are too long”
“What sort of things did Alice write of?” Curiosity piqued my attention; it seemed that Alice had been up to something she was allowing to play out after her demise.
“Just things that are better left for when you're home. She and Marcus are on the same page for several things that I'm not sure about how I feel yet, but if she had visions of them happening I don't see where I, or we, can stop them despite any intentions otherwise. Enough of this, for now. Enjoy your trip the best you can, get to Renesmee, tell her a thousand times over how much her daddy loves her, and then bring her home so we can be a family again. I am supposed to tell you, from Alice, that she's sorry about the batteries and that she knew the game would be fun. What does that mean? What game?”
“Oh that.” Quick thinking time Bella “My iPod batteries died shortly into the flight so Jasper took it onto himself to entertain us with a game of Resist the Emotions, Airplane style.” I would not be telling him about my near joining of the Mile High Club. Good. “In the end, Jasper won; it was nice seeing him happy again even for a few moments.”
“Thanks for playing along, love. I'm sure you all needed some time to forget. Perhaps play another round later, give him an outlet and give the three of you a good dose of humor for the trip.”
An outlet, right.
“I should get back to them, our plane should begin boarding soon love. I love you, Edward.”
“I love you, my Bella. Be safe, my little danger magnet. Until our next call, love. My heart is with you; keep it safe.”
He closed his phone without letting me respond. I returned to my seat between the boys, earning more glares from the school girls and their giggles. For once I was thankful Edward wasn't with us. I don't know if I could control my response to seeing girls fawning over my husband. Jasper arched an eyebrow at me so I'm guessing he picked up some odd responses from me. As he assimilated the jealousy his lips twitched like he was trying to stop a smile. He then blanketed us all in calm before putting his arm across my shoulders.
“What do you think you're doing?”
“Giving the girls a show. Trust me, it will be enjoyable. Lean back into me. Emm, grab her feet.” I found myself being pulled up across their laps as Emmett slid into my chair. Jasper started to comb his fingers through my hair, fanning it over his legs before starting to rub my temples. He then slid off his glasses and looked over at the girls, unleashing the full dazzle. The collective sigh was hard to ignore and I had to fight to keep from laughing. Emmett had started a rather relaxing foot and leg massage when our flight was called. Jas stood, pulling me with him so that I was on my feet smoothly. Emmett began flexing, showing off his muscular build and making the girls delay getting in the boarding queue until we were past. Even I had to admit he has an impressive form. He's not my Edward, but both of my brothers are definitely gorgeous. Then the perfect revenge for earlier came to mind.
“Oh, Jasper.” I slid my glasses up on top of my head like a headband. I turned his face to mine and did my best to mimic what Edward's always done to me, widening my eyes, smiling up at him. When his own eyes widened and breathing became labored, I knew I'd done it right. So I thought of what we'd done earlier until I felt the familiar ache between my legs start up. His left hand clamped down on my shoulder while his right slid my glasses back into place before tracing his finger over my lower lip.
“I'd stop that if you don't want a repeat performance in the middle of first class. Edward was right, you are a dangerous creature.” I laughed at how shaken he was and skipped off to the queue with my ticket and boarding pass.
“Bro, you started something on the plane and I don't know if Eddiekins will be happy when we get home, with any of us. I mean, I miss Rose more than anything, but man I'd tap that in a minute if I could.”
“Me too, Emmett. Me too.” I looked over at my brothers, knowing that I'd be blushing from both embarrassment and a little bit of indignation over their discussion of me as if I couldn't hear them. I sighed and tapped my foot while they came over with the bags.
Our seats in first class were comfortable, not as nice as the couches in the jet, but nice none the less. The boys and I sat together, making me thankful to no longer have human needs as the stewardesses completely ignored me to ask Emmett and Jasper if they needed anything and to assure them that anything they wanted, anything at all, would be obtained immediately. It annoyed me more than it should have, but then I guess being a good sister to Alice and Rose I didn't like seeing my brothers flirted with when their mates were so recently gone.
I was most definitely not jealous.
The flight itself was uneventful- we sat listening to music, occasionally visiting, and making the random visit to the bathroom to appear normal. Luckily for Emmett and me, Jasper was pretending to be asleep and did not continue the previous game. I am still confused over what happened, well not what happened but the reasoning behind it and what it means from here. I'm married to their brother, he's the love of my existence, my soul mate, they are my brothers and we're all in mourning for their lost wives. Having them think of me in that way- as someone desirable- is a mindtrip. I've always been plain human Bella. And then I found Edward and he thought I was beautiful. Then he saved my life after Nessie was born, making me one of them, making me as beautiful as they are. Now this.
Edward once told me that vampires don't change quickly, but I think we may have changed on that plane. Something is different. I feel a love beyond familial for them, maybe it's just lust.
Oh god! I can't believe I did that with Jasper. Even fully clothed, it was too far. I hope that Edward can forgive me. If he doesn't, I don't know what I'll do. I can't leave Renesmee, but I cannot exist without Edward at my side. He's my other half but now it is like the piece of our puzzle has gotten larger and made room for others within it. What if we could share? Would he share me? If the situation was reversed, could I share him? Is this what Alice wanted for Jasper? Could I ever live up to what Rose and Alice were like in bed? They had a human lifetime together, more even, and I'm just 18 and have only been with Edward.
“Can you please stop it? You're driving me insane. Confusion, love, anger, hapiness, love, lust- lots of lust, more love, confusion, despair, jealousy.. Can't you just pick one feeling and stay there?” Jasper's voice came out as a low hiss, too quick for any one without our sensitive ears to hear.
“I'm sorry but most of them are your fault.” I turned away and set my head against the window, turning up my speakers to drown out any further conversation. I felt childish, as if I'd turned and stuck my tongue out at him, but I just couldn't deal with this now. It's too dangerous if I get upset, I didn't want to risk our trip if bloodlust came over me. The burn was still as strong as the very first day but I am able to ignore it, lock it away, breathe shallowly until the danger is past. It still requires part of my brain focusing on my human family, remembering that this scent I'm picking up is human, not food. Every time I feel the burn of venom on my throat, the consuming fire, I know that Edward loves me. He fought a desire for my blood stronger than I feel now because he loved me more than he wanted my blood. My thoughts turned to Renesmee and holding her in my arms once again. She'd be taller now, probably thinned out a bit, although the way Jacob eats, she just as likely could be putting on weight too- trying to keep up with him.
My thoughts lost on my beautiful daughter, the remainder of the flight went quickly as I went over every memory of Renesmee. The landing gear withdrawing from its storage space shook me from wandering in my own mind. Jasper grabbed my arm and pulled me from the plane as soon as the doors were open, Emmett behind and to the side. Jasper sensed my confusion and alarm and said “Come on, let's get our bags and go to the hotel before the sun comes out. We have a short window according to Alice. Let's not screw up already.” He slid his arm down to my lower back, the touch firm and guiding yet intimate; had blood still flowed in my veins the blush would be creeping down my neck at this point. His chuckle heightened my reaction and I sidestepped away to walk with Emmett, not knowing if I should like the feelings I had.
“Emmett, could you just carry me through here? The scent is getting to me when people come too close. Please, big brother?” I tilted my head down while looking up, letting the sunglasses slide down a little so he could see my eyes. He picked me up into his arms and slung me over his shoulder while I laughed. Emmett slapped me on my ass for laughing so I started smacking him. Jasper seemed a little upset at our antics, which had Emmett making faces. His childlike nature is so refreshing at times.
We made it to the baggage claim, picked up our suitcases and headed out to the shuttles. The temperature would have been oppressive had I been human, I could feel the humidity pressing on us and smell the salt on the breeze from the ocean. And then I smelled it.. The faint remnant of Jake and Renesmee. My silent heart swelled in my chest and a single tear slid down my cheek. I scrubbed at the venom with my shirt cuff to keep it from burning again- the skin just now fully healed from the last ones to fall. “They've been here. I smell them.”
Jasper spoke in hurried Portuguese with a bus driver, finding us one that would take us near our hotel. We were bordering the Tijuca Forest as closely as possible, hunting be our first goal tonight. As we exited the shuttle, we decided it would be best to play the honeymoon card as we had the suite waiting for us. Edward hadn't changed our reservations despite the change in travelers. Emmett picked me up into his arms and carried me in his arms while our “translator and tour guide” helped check us in. I had some rudimentary knowledge of Spanish but no where near Jasper's fluency, but then he'd had to deal with so many armies from this area during his war fighting at Maria's side. Emmett just seemed amused to be holding me and being allowed to cop a feel of my ass while I squirmed in his arms. Jasper procured our key and led us to the stairs up to our room. The hotel was open to the breezes and I longed to lay out in the sunshine to soak up the rays I'd missed living in Forks but not here of all places. Perhaps our next home would have a safe place to enjoy the sun.
Emmett tossed me onto the bed, my laughter ringing through room. Jasper dropped our bags with a huff, “I'm glad someone's amused at this.”
I couldn't let him stay upset. “Oh Jasper, lighten up. You can carry me next if it'll help.” I giggled at the shock on his face. “I'm going to go shower and get changed. Hunt tonight?”
The water washed away the smells of all the humans that had come close to us. I slipped into the terrycloth hotel robe before going to my suitcase. Opening it I saw that each day had two if not three outfits already labeled and on hangers. Alice. For now she had a pair of black yoga pants with a ballet top in charcoal waiting for me. I slid them on and then let the boys figure out who go the next shower. I called Edward while Jasper was in the shower and Emmett was getting dressed in the front room. I sprawled out on the bed while listening to the smooth velvet tones I missed already.
Emmett started singing “Edward and Bella sitting in a tree,” only stopping when I picked up the lamp, ready to throw it at his head. “What is with the hitting? All the women folk in this family want to hit me.” Edward's clear laughter echoed through the phone and he told me to go hunt, another profession of love and this time I closed my phone first.
At dusk we slipped from the back patio of the hotel down the path to the forest, passing beneath the one hundred and twenty feet tall statue of Jesus. Emmett looked around before scaling the statue to sit on Jesus' shoulder. “Look, I'm one with the man. You want salvation, talk to me, baby.” Jasper and I lost it, laughing until we sat on the ground, rocking with hysterics. Then a new scent hit us and we saw a golden orange flash through the trees- several of them. Emmett jumped down, the ground dented where he landed, and took off after the creatures. Jasper and I stayed on the path, shadowing where Emmett loped in the woods. He came out holding two furry creatures, one in each hand. “Evil Demons! I found Evil Demons.”
Jasper and I looked at what he held, golden lion tamarins, annoying and cute, but not evil nor demons.
“The movie said they're demons. Nicole Kidman had one and it sure was evil.”
It dawned on me what he was talking about it. The Golden Compass. Mrs. Coulter's Daemon. “Emmett, big brother, I love you but you really need to start reading. It's daemon.. D. A.E.M.O.N. Not demon like an evil spirit. Besides- it was just a movie.” His goofy grin was infectious and I started smiling as he tossed one to each of us, a quick snack before the real hunt.

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A/N: The golden lion tamarins are an endangered species; their numbers are no longer found in all of the rain forests of their former homeland.

TTTB Chapter 3: Reattachment

One month later...
BPOV
Finally the time had arrived to find our daughter; we were determined to have her home by Christmas. We would have a tree and presents like a real family, like the family we had been before the Volturi arrived. Edward and Carlisle had mapped out the entire city of Rio, making an itinerary of sorts- where to go, what streets must be traversed in hopes of picking up Jake's scent or setting our own. Edward made us reservations at some rather nice hotels throughout the city and a few small suburbs. Carlisle was finishing up his notations, while I flipped through the confirmation pages Edward had placed into the trip binder. My husband was nothing but thorough. I looked up at him when I saw a printout reserving a bridal suite.
“It might as well be an enjoyable trip while we are there. It will be a few years before we can really take off with Nessie again and I don't plan on us being away from her until she's fully grown.” Edward has been so busy these past few weeks, scanning Marcus's thoughts for any possible plots as well as searching out the minds of Jasper and Emmett for ways to help them heal. So far all he'd seen is that Marcus is a lonely old vampire who has compassion and understanding for our brothers since he also lost a mate, his dear wife was murdered centuries ago.
“I know, Edward. I just want to get there, find her immediately, and then bring her home. I don't think I can truly enjoy any surroundings without our little girl. She'll have changed so much in the time she's away. What if she doesn't want to come home? What if she's happier with it being just her and Jake? What if he doesn't want to come with us? What if he went somewhere else? What if something happened to them and she's wandering lost? What if something happened and we never find her or she's gone? What if people come for Marcus while we're gone? What will Esme and Carlisle do? What if we're bringing Renesmee into a trap?” Panic was escalating in my voice and I could feel the venom building in my throat as my body responded to my fear. Edward's hand traced circles on my lower back, his touch once again bringing a welcomed calm. How happy I am that his affect on me did not change when he gave me my reinforcements.
“Love, she'll be fine. You told me yourself that Alice sent you to get those papers. She'll be fine with Jake. If anything had happened, he'd have gotten word to us or Seth somehow. You've always said you'd never bet against her, don't start now. Trust Alice, trust Jake, trust me. We'll get her home, we'll reunite our family.” Edward's head tilted towards Carlisle, reading the present thoughts. “I hadn't thought of that, Father. You're right. I don't like it, but you are right.” Another pause, “yes, we can only ask. Bella, love?”
I didn't like the questioning tone and knew that he was changing plans on me. We no longer had someone checking over our decisions so we were walking blindly now. “After your comment about a trap, Carlisle does not feel secure having both of us gone from the house as long as we hold Marcus here. I am needed here to make sure we are not being deceived. Perhaps our brothers can go with you so that you are not lonely on your journey. Emmett's brawn should scare off most problems that you and Jasper cannot avoid. I'll be here waiting with open arms for you and Nessie. I do not wish to be parted from you, but I can't see any other way to ensure our strength is equally placed. Esme and Carlisle need someone here that can read the enemy should another contingent arrive and the wolves will listen to me if I call. Jasper can determine what any possible threat may be and your shield should protect from what your newborn strength or my brothers cannot.”
He was right. I knew that, despite how badly my chest ached at the thought of being separated, Edward and Carlisle were right. His presence was required here. I would be safe to travel with Jasper and Emmett and a trip abroad may be just what they needed to help dull the pain. They both love Renesmee, having a purpose could bring them back from the brink of despair I had known so well. So I did what Edward has always claimed I do best, I pouted. I don't know if I have mastered the Cullen pout he was so good at, but it let him know I was displeased but complacent. I let out a frustrated sigh as Carlisle nodded and smiled before heading back up to his office for the credit cards we would need on our journey as well as inform my brothers of the change in plans if they had not overheard our conversation.
“Very well, Edward. I know you are right. I don't like it, but you and Carlisle are right. You are needed here. I leave my heart with you in your hands. I'll miss you with every fiber of my being, but I'll find her and bring her home.” At that I placed my hands upon his temples as Zafrina had shown me and enveloped him in my inner shield, pulling the rubber band out from my mind and letting it settle around him, allowing him access to the different frequency as he'd once put it. I love you and will be looking forward to seeing how much you missed me. The look of shock on his face was priceless. I ducked my chin, embarrassment washing through me at how forward I'd been in my flirting.
“How di... did you do that? I heard you! Can you do it again?” Edward searched my eyes. I smiled and touched him again “It's hard, but yes, if you don't distract me.” His lips crashed down on mine “That, love, is a distraction.” Edward laughed and picked me up into his arms.

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EPOV
I love you and will be looking forward to seeing how much you missed me. I heard her! How? When did she learn that?
“How di... did you do that?” I'm stuttering? When does a vampire stutter? “I heard you! Can you do it again?” Please, let her do it again! To be able to hear my darling bride's thoughts, a small wish granted in these dim days. Bella stroked her fingers across my face to press at my temples It's hard, but yes, if you don't distract me. My excitement needed an outlet and I pressed my lips to her, showing her how happy I was to finally hear her once silent mind. I have to tell Carlisle- this could be huge. He'll want to test her strength now that we have better ideas how her shield works. Bella won't agree until after Nessie is home. It still will not help if she doesn't want me to know something, because Bella is too stubborn to just let me in all the time. She enjoys her mental privacy. Oh, God. Her silence will be tortuous now.
So I did the one thing I could think of, I ran upstairs with her.
“Carlisle? Dad!!” I heard a bunch of confusion and could hear Esme's thoughts as she abandoned her garden and came in through the back and Carlisle headed out of the study to head me off on the stairs. “I can hear her when she drops her shield. I can hear her!” Bella was shaking with her laughter in my arms as I carried her up to the second floor.
“Edward, I can walk, you know. I thought you were over carrying me everywhere?” But you can carry me up to your bedroom anytime, or the shower or the meadow” A growl grew in my chest at her words, her spoken thoughts over images of us joined together. She seemed pleased as she nestled closer to me and spoke once more, This will be all sorts of fun, Edward. I could both see through her eyes that she was watching Carlisle as I climbed the stairs to him as well as see her images of things we've never done, things I've only imagined doing, but a gentleman would never hint at to his wife.
“Bella, you'll be the death of me with thoughts like that.” She threw her head back and laughed. Carlisle looked at us with amusement flickering across his face. Bella tossed one last image towards me, one of her on her knees before me, and I lost my grip on her and she fell from my arms and landed unceremoniously on the floor, still laughing at me.
“I'm guessing I don't want to know what you were thinking, my darling daughter, do I?” Bella looked to her feet, had she been human she would have blushed crimson, and for the first time outside of hunting, Jasper left his study.
“No, you don't, I'm heading for the supplies you suggested, Carlisle.” There was a bounce in his step though as he walked. I wondered if his and Bella's daily visits and time spent reading had been helping him?
Jasper's thoughts were random as if he were trying to block me. He seemed oddly distracted by seeing Bella and I together. An image of him watching her read while curled up on his bed flickered through his mind. Jealousy seethed below my skin. I must have been looking too long at him and he picked up my emotion before I sealed it away. His eyes flared and his mental voice was short with me It's not what you're thinking. She's been a good friend, a good sister. I'll love Alice until the day I cease to be, no one could take her place and I'd never make you feel what I do, Brother. I love YOUR Bella like a sister and can admire her beauty but not want her. I cherish the time she spends with me in silence, reading together, she distracts me from the pain and emptiness. She's given me something to look forward to. Thank you for sharing her time with me. I'll take good care of her when you are parted. I know that each moment is too long for you and her. Perhaps I can return a small part of the gift she has given me. Go get her tiger- just keep it quiet, please and he passed down the stairs to Emmett's relentless battling of aliens or whatever game he was playing today to share the news about going to Rio. I assume Carlisle had already spoken to Jasper at least while I was distracted with Bella.
I vaguely registered the conversation between Bella and Carlisle. She was promising a full examination and test when she returned with Renesmee and otherwise she needed to head to the cabin and pack. Carlisle had chartered a private jet from Seattle to Mexico City and then first class tickets from there to Rio for the three of them. Esme went to grab the suitcases from the storage room for the three of them. They had time to pack, hunt, clean up, and then really needed to be on their way. Forty five seconds later, we heard Esme sobbing. Twenty seconds beyond that found all of us that remained of the Cullen family standing with Esme in the basement storage room near three already packed suitcases, holding a letter Alice left.
Jasper reached out his hand for the letter and read it aloud to us.
“Jazzy- I know you'll take this from mom so go ahead and read it to them all before Edward starts picking Esme's brain about it.
My dear ones. To answer your questions- yes I knew I wasn't going to walk away. I didn't see about Rose until just a few moments before returning home. Jasper didn't know, don't blame him. He wouldn't have let me be on the same continent had he known. I went through with it for all of you- to save those of you I could. Nessie- sorry Bella- little Nessie is having a wonderful time with her Jacob. You'll find her on your second day when you take the tram up the mountainside. The sun will be shining before then, so enjoy your suite. Edward, by now Carlisle has told you that you're staying home so my Jazzy and Emm will be taking her. They'll be fine and she'll be home exactly 6 days, 3 hours, and 25 minutes from when she leaves. The weather will be overcast for a few days after they are reunited, let them have some fun while Nessie is still a child.
Don't worry. I'm pretty sure the pain was momentary and is worth saving all of you. Jasper, you were the love of my existence and I've never been so thankful of my gift as when it led me to you. Carlisle and Esme, thank you so much for welcoming us to your family. You brought me such happiness. Edward, you were the annoying big brother I never knew I wanted, but always needed. Bella, you were exactly what he needed to get the stick out of his ass and be the good brother we all knew he could be. The family needs you now more than ever. Take care of Jasper and Emmett. Make them smile, for me. Emmett, she loved you more than life and I'll make sure to find her on the other side so we can watch over you and laugh at your antics. You'll be able to beat Bella at arm wrestling 2 weeks after her anniversary.
Now, no peeking in your suitcases. I know you won't since I've asked. If I see that you have before I meet my end in the clearing, I'll make sure that your wardrobes are completely replaced one last time. Jasper, do you remember the 70's? Bella and Emmett- I can do even worse for you.
No more tears from me. I'm happy that you're all okay. Love and Dance and Sing and above all Live.. Don't just exist.. live for me. Let me live on through you.
Yours always
Mary Alice
PS. This isn't the last letter you'll find. Don't look for them, they'll find you.
It was then that I heard a low hiss escape Bella's lips. We all looked at her to see venom slowly trickling from her eyes, burning her cheeks as she quickly rubbed it off onto her sleeve. Jasper had her in his arms before I could register what was happening. His thoughts were flying by so quickly as he jumped from pondering how our Bella could cry- our Bella? I'd have to ask later on that- to why she felt so guilty, his own guilt that his pain was part of her guilt and tears, to berating himself for feeling a slight amount of happiness that one of us could truly cry for Alice and Rosalie. I reached to pull Bella against my chest and it was then that Jasper growled at me. The growl lasted a hundredth of a second, just enough for him to hear it and get his emotions in check before releasing her to me, I'm sorry, man, I don't know what that was about. I need to get outside before the trip. I'll see you all on the hunt. As he took off up the stairs to the front door, we all heard Marcus's bell like laughter echo through the halls from the lower suite where Carlisle was keeping him.

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BPOV
With packing behind us, it was time to hunt. Carlisle and Edward, while impressed with my self-control, were worried that unless I was fully glutted on blood, I could be a danger on the second plane. After our recent revelation in the lower level over Alice's vision, and my still stinging cheeks, I needed to release myself to my instincts- to just let go for a while. Carlisle and Esme scouted the perimeter before the boys and I let loose. Edward stood by to watch me hunt, always the gentleman in making sure that I had my fill first. Although he would deny it by saying he could hunt more after I left. As he finished his third deer and before he could pull back from the hunt mentality I sent a few more images his direction. It was much harder to share my thoughts without touching him so I was limited to bursts of my fantasies; making him into my prey, ripping his clothes from him, and more images like I had sent earlier of taking the proof of his desire past my lips and tracing it with my lips and tongue until he finally let go of that damned self-control. Perhaps the instinct of the hunt would take over and keep his conscious asleep so that we could set the love making aside and immerse fully in one another, to just fuck for the sake of the physical release.
Edward's eyes snapped to my face and then perused my body, not the sensual gaze he often did when taking in my form. This was a look of possession as he stalked me. I thought again of me sitting astride his slender hips, my hands pushing against his chest for leverage. I smirked as he pounced. This game was mine. A purr rumbled in my chest as the anticipation and arousal took over. The crash echoed through the woods but we never collided. I looked up to see him tangled with Emmett against what remained of an old oak.
“Save it for later, Eddie boy. We need to get going. Jasper felt you from a mile away.” Emmett had a hand on the back of Edward's neck, effectively scruffing him, stretching him to stand on his toes, while Edward growled and tried to swipe at our interruption. I stood up and slipped between them, a hand on both of their chests.
“Emmett, dammit! You couldn't give us ten more minutes? Let go of my husband now before I throw you across the river.” As Edward was released I grabbed onto his arm to prevent him from attacking our dear big brother. Dear. Yes, I must keep reminding myself that I do love him so I don't throw him into a tree. “Come, love. Let's head up to the house so I can tell Mom and Dad goodbye before you drive us to the airport. Before you know it, I will be home again and we can continue from where we were so rudely interrupted.”
Our goodbyes made, we piled into the Volvo and made a silent trip to the airport. Edward's speeding no longer bothered me but he still kept the speedometer under 100, in no hurry to be parted from me, I assumed. Edward's annoyance at Emmett was still seething under his skin despite Jasper's best efforts, based on Emmet's smile I could guess the content of his thoughts. I held Edward's hand as we approached the airport terminal drop-off, doing what I could to soothe his mind by sending what I knew were his favorite memories of me. His proposal-despite the faint blur it had in my thoughts, our meadow, sitting on our couch in the cottage holding Renesmee as he read her a book.
Don't think of this as goodbye love. It will only be one week. Think of it as an extended hunting trip, just that I'm hunting for our daughter instead of a meal. Hey, this is getting easier each time I speak to you this way! We have an eternity to be together. Six days Edward. Help distract Esme, go over Carlisle's files for him if he needs the assistance, add a room to our cottage if you need something physical to do, compose a song. Do something, anything... Don't dwell on us being apart. I don't want to leave you here sad. I'm going to get our daughter and bring her back. Go shopping- get her toys, she'd like that. If you must, go into town and buy me something- I know you enjoy spoiling me. He looked over and smiled, stroking his thumb across my hand.
When the car stopped, Edward hopped out and grabbed my bags, leaving the boys to their own. He looked at me, raising an eyebrow- daring me to argue. I just shook my head and let a smile lift the corner of my mouth. “Exasperating boy that I love.” Edward laughed and led the way to the private charter final security point. He hugged Jasper and Emmett, nodding at each of them in response to their silent conversation, before clutching me to his chest and burying his face in my hair.
“I shall miss you, love. Six days, three hours, and 25 minutes... I shall count them down. Call when you arrive and as many times daily as you can. Jasper has the phone charger in his bags. Go on. Bring Nessie home. I'll be here with my arms waiting to hold you when you have returned. There might be some presents too... I'm holding you to that.” He dropped his voice so low even I could barely hear it as he whispered into my ear, “as well as those images you had earlier, Isabella. Emm, Jasper, take care of her for me. I am trusting you with my life here.” With that he stepped back, gave me that crooked smile I love, and mouthed “Go, love.”
Emmett grabbed my suitcase and I grabbed my bag and we headed through security and onto our plane. The private jet was small- a few couches, some lovely leather seats for when we needed to be strapped in- what a joke- as well as a fridge. Jasper put his entire carry on into the fridge and after feeling my confusion turned and said “A mid-flight vegetarian snack courtesy of Carlisle to make sure we are well satiated for the layover and second flight. We won't have time to hunt and can't bring this on the next plane obviously.” He took a seat next to Emmett, put on his headphones and closed his eyes. I watched the world fall beneath us as the plane took to the sky.

TTTB Chapter 2: Healing Balm

BPOV
“Mom,” was all I whispered as I held Esme tight against me and her hand went to the small of my back. Esme held me and breathed deep as if trying to memorize my scent, to keep it in her mind forever. Edward wrapped his arms around both of us, his chin resting on top of my head as he pressed his lips into Esme's hair. We stood there until we heard Carlisle on the stairs and we broke apart to enter the home and the four of us held each other and let our grief go unspoken.
I looked to Edward as the embrace ended and he knew me well enough to know what I wanted. “They're upstairs. You take Jasper, I'll take Emmett.” I brushed my lips against my parents' cheeks before making the sad climb up the stairs, stairs I had last climbed to ransack Alice's closet for Renesmee's backpack. Edward just pushed the door open and went into Emmett and Rose's room while I rapped my knuckles lightly on the door to Jasper's study. I knew he wouldn't be in their room; there would be too much pain.
Silence. I turned the knob, happy to see it unlocked, for I would have gone in regardless, and this made less work for Esme later. Jasper was draped across the chair under the window, a book on his lap, a paper in his hand, just staring at the wall.
Jasper looked up as I approached and closed his eyes before tilting his head toward the floor. I knelt beside him and laid my head onto his chest, holding him was impossible due to how he was laying in the chair. Jasper radiated numbness, his pain too far gone to feel much more. I stayed there until he shifted, sliding to the floor with me, his arms around me as he whispered repeatedly to me, to himself, to the world.
“She's gone. My Alice is gone.” His arms pulled me tighter after his seventy third repetition and then he went silent. I shifted onto my back and dragged him with me so that his head was over where my heart had been and I stroked his hair back and whispered things such as, “I know,” “I'm sorry,” and “I'm here. Let it out.” The words were unimportant, being there was what he needed. I could hear Edward next door giving Emmett a pep talk, making sure he knew that the traitors were long dead, and how he had to pull it together to help take of Nessie for Rose, that he had to live for Rose, that she won't want him to follow after. I opened my mouth to say something similar to Jasper but the words wouldn't come. Maybe I knew that this was what he needed more. I just held him and whispered into his blond waves. I held him much like Jake had held me as I cried over Edward.
I could be his and Emmett's personal sun. I would help piece them together, I'd be the glue that held them as whole as they could be. I heard the door open behind me and knew that Edward wanted to speak with Jasper. I hugged him tighter before slowly gaining my feet and exiting the room. Edward ran his fingertips down my cheek as I passed, his heart in his eyes, the small token of affection he could afford to give me in his mourning brother's presence.
“Hey, big brother,” escaped my lips before I could think of what I should say as I walked into the red and pink satin draped room. He looked up from the bed to me and gave a fake smile, probably expecting another peptalk. I kicked off my shoes and crawled across the bed and hugged him, much as I had to Jasper. He held me for a minute before sitting up. Emmett chuckled deep in his chest and sat up, pulling me with him.
“I don't think she'd like another woman in our bed, even if it was my little sister.” His laugh became forced as it mixed with more crying. His eyes searched the room, probably trying to find something safe to look at. The mirrors reflected that he was alone, the bed where he had shared so much with her, their chairs and loveseat. He finally settled on the tv, a miniature of the one in the living room, with only one game system set up. Inspiration hit.
“Emm... wanna see if you can kick my ass at Toxic Grind now? You sure couldn't when I was a human. Maybe I'll break the controller or I won't remember the trick moves.” His face lit up, a little bit of the boyishness surfacing. Emmett's husky frame was off the bed and into the chair by the tv in a flash, the controller in hand and my chair swiveled for me before the game had finished loading. I won the first round, the bike trick combinations easier to perform with faster reflexes although I lost the second match because I cracked the controller, still too strong and unused to dealing with such a fragile piece of equipment. His loud celebratory “Whooop Whooop” sounded through the house. It was a forced response, but it was the best I could expect for years.
Edward and Jasper must have heard the noise and were standing the doorway watching Emmett do his victory dance before Edward held out his hand, beckoning me over. I curled into his chest, smelling the sweet honey and cinnamon scent of my soulmate and let it wash over me along with his love. I felt a short wave of jealousy from Jasper, quickly replaced with pain and remorse before he locked it away again. I petted his arm before slipping between them and downstairs. I sunk down into the couch, listening to Esme consoling Kate on the loss of her sisters and asking what she is planning. Carmen and Eleazar were the only others to remain, the nomads having gone their way as the fight dispersed. The boys joined me, Edward pulling me into his lap as his brothers sat on the couch across from us. No words were spoken, but I could read Edward's face, the flickers of pain he couldn't quite prevent nor erase as his brothers' thoughts swept through him.
We must have sat there for hours. It was dusk when Esme and Carlisle joined us, squeezing in next to Edward and me. Emmett broke the silence asking when Jake would bring back Nessie.
“I don't know Em. I wasn't expecting us to still stand if a fight occurred. I left enough money for Jake to keep them comfortable for some time. Assuming he listened to me, they are well on their way to Rio De Janeiro. Safe. I didn't think to send my cell with them.” I dropped my head to Edward's shoulder and tried to steady my now panicked breathing.
“I have to get her back. I need my little girl back in my arms. She's my heart, my life, she needs to be home.” Edward was rubbing soothing circles on my lower back, trying to calm me, before Jasper brought his gift to bear upon me, my unneeded breathing slowing to a norm, my emotions settling into a numbness, an echo of his own. I attempted a small smile at him before he excused himself for the night. He needed some time to himself. As he entered the hall, Carlisle finally spoke what we all felt.
“Jasper, you are still my son and are welcome here, even without her. I know this wasn't the life you would have chosen, but we love you and if you'll have us, we'd love to have you here. You've lost your mate, the pain will never be erased, you'll always feel that emptiness, but it will become easier in time. Let us help you when you're ready.” Carlisle seemed placated by Jasper's stiff nod before turning to the stairs and climbing to his room. His numbness still filled me so I guess he was sweeping it through everyone.
His absence left the room feeling empty, a void without Alice's laughter, Rosalie and Emmett wrapped up in each other's presence, without Renesmee playing with her toys. Her new toys, stacking peek-a-blocks, were still littered the floor behind the couches, the recently designated play area. I could see her drawing table covered in crayons from her last “color making” as she described in my head. I remembered Edward sitting on his heels while our little girl had one hand on his cheek, one hand on a crayon as she showed him what she wanted him to draw with her. Without remembering having left his lap, I found myself putting away her toys into their bins, awaiting her return. She'd probably be too old for them by the time I got her home, if we found them at all.
I jumped as I felt Edward's arms go around my waist, lifting me from my crouch to press against his chest, his cheek against mine. “I miss her too, love. We'll leave soon to bring her home where she belongs. She'll be sleeping in her room in the cottage, growing up before our eyes, and we'll have to deal with Jake's smell and his thoughts, but for her we'll get through everything. You gave me the greatest gift by bringing her into our lives, and I'm not letting us be separated now for more than necessary. You and Nessie are my reason for existence, and I'll never let us be parted again. It will take Jacob a few days to get them there and more time to feel comfortable enough to come out of hiding. We'll get to them in a few weeks even though every minute is a moment too long.
"Let's give us time to wash away the physical evidence before we bring her home.” I could hear the pain in his voice as he tried to be strong for me. Even as his heart was breaking, Edward tried to hide it so he could be my strength. The shaking of his chest and breaking of his voice was enough to show that he was hurting as much as I. She truly was Daddy's little girl and all the fighting we had before she was born was gone. He loved her completely, one of his greatest regrets of losing his humanity granted to him and, as he often said, the best thing I could have ever provided for him besides loving him, monster and all.
“Bella, love, I don't know if I can deal with being in our cabin until she's back. I don't know if you can. Perhaps we can stay here until she's home. It's not like we sleep, and we still have clothing here in my closet.” I turned into his arms and nodded before setting my head on his chest, Edward's arms holding me safely against him. He murmured sweet nothings, words of comfort, his frozen breath tickling my neck, my hands instinctively going into his hair and pulling his lips to mine while the familiar shivers started as his lips grazed my ear when he whispered.
The rest had returned to their own rooms as we stood there, moonlight shining through the windows, our hope of a future the fragile thread holding us all together. Renesmee would keep us bound throughout the lifetimes of pain ahead as we healed from the loss we sustained last night. He picked me up into his arms and took me upstairs so we could provide a balm to the wounds inflicted upon our souls.

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EPOV
I carried Bella up the stairs to my room, our room now, and laid her on the couch. I started the stereo with one of her additions to my collection and turned to look at my wife. The moonlight reflected on her alabaster skin, and I could briefly imagined the warm blush across her cheeks from me looking upon her beautiful form. I'm glad that she felt as I did that our home wasn't our home without Nessie's beautiful brown eyes and laughter filling the rooms. The fireplace had nothing on the warmth she provided to our lives. Bella's hair fanned beneath her head upon the arm of the couch, her eyes on me, her husband. My wife, my wife! The thought of it still stirred my long silent heart. Even with the grief we sustained, I felt another stirring, a different thirst, one only quenched by my dearest Bella. The few months we've had to this day as husband and wife have been filled with so much love, I finally understood the ever present impure thoughts of those around us. The physical act, such intimacy, is mind blowing.
I loosened my belt and started to release the buttons of my shirt when Bella stood and crossed the room to me. She looked into my eyes, hers deepest black as her desire ignited flames matching mine. Bella's slim fingers coaxed the buttons free and slipped one hand inside the shirt onto my chest, a slight hiss escaping my lips before they claimed hers. My patience gone, I pulled free for a moment to pull my shirt over my head as she mirrored my action and yanked her dress up, standing before me in green lace, her hair trailing over her shoulders, a silken waterfall draping her breasts. There are no words for the beauty she holds over me, she astounds me with every flex of her muscles, her breath stretching her ribcage, denting lightly under my grasp as I pull her back to me. Our kiss was less gentle, our bodies pressed tightly, her panties and my pants separating us.
Bella's breath caught in her chest as I undid the clasp of her bra, slid the silk straps over her ams, and trailed my lips and tongue in the same path.
“Edward, please. I need you. Help me forget, just for a little while.”
The purring started in my chest as she pulled me back to her lips, and I lowered the zipper on my pants, each tooth clicking loose until the fabric pooled at my feet. I carried her to the bed, the bed I proposed to her on, and settled her onto the coverlet before removing my boxers and kneeling over her to liberate her hips and heat from the damp lace. The warm musky scent of our arousal filled the room, and strengthened my lust for her. I could feel my erection straining towards her and knew that tonight would not be the gentle love-making we normally took part in. The coupling would be loving, yes, but it would be hard as we lost ourself in each other. Her hand trailed down my chest before clasping around my length, her eyes locking on mine as she bit her lip, always my downfall. I crashed my lips to hers, one arm going under her, and the other to the apex of her thighs, my fingers tracing where I longed to be. I slid a finger gently into her opening, the bucking of her hips combined with the moisture enough to shatter the slim hold on my desire. I lowered myself to her and lost myself within her depths.
It was only moments after we lay spent next to one another when I could hear my father and Esme locked in a similar embrace, their thoughts tuned solely on each other. Our own desire sated, my mind picked up on the other thoughts. Emmett felt lost, he heard the sounds of our sexual encounter and was reliving past memories he and Rosalie had shared. His desire for her was eternal and no one would compare to what she had made him feel. Yet he reveled in our lust and pleasured himself with Rose's image locked in his mind's eye. It was Jasper's thoughts that brought me out of my haze. He not only had to deal with the sounds, but our emotions. Jasper could feel our bond, our love, and the lust and desire we had unconsciously thrown off from the living room to our bedroom. The release we found in each other's arms, the ecstasy only she has ever brought me, brought his pain to a pinnacle as I spilled my venom within her.

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BPOV
Edward seemed distracted in the moments after our love-making, his face having lost the serenity our joining had given him. The sex itself was amazing as always but it did little but delay our memories of Alice and Rosalie. The sound of a slamming door echoed to my enhanced hearing and footsteps sounded on the floor beneath ours before accessing the stairs to the main floor. A second door sounded and then quiet resumed. I looked to my husband, at his eyebrows knitting together, his jaw tight before he tucked it into my shoulder and releasing his breath in a forced sigh of “Jasper.” I crawled out from under his head and threw on my dress, running for the door.
“He wants to be alone, love. Let him go. He'll be back. He heard us and felt us as well as Carlisle and Esme. It was too much to feel the emotions as well as hear our acts. Let's clean up and head downstairs. He'll need us when he returns. Come shower with me.” Edward grasped my hand and I let him pull me to the shower, a new bottle of my strawberry shampoo on the rack. He started the water before taking hold of the hem and tracing his hands up my sides, his thumbs dragging the fabric up my body until it cleared my head to fall behind me as he lifted me into the shower with him.

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A/N: This was my very first lemon. *cringe* I certainly hope they've improved since then. I really wanted to rewrite it, but the responses on Twitter were to leave it as is.