Taking a break

A whole lot of stuff is going on at the moment and I need to take a few days to just breathe. I will try to write, but I can't promise anything.

Tying up the Lemons

An additional donation for the Fandom Gives Back Author Auction.

Pen Name: Definately Staying and Fiberkitty
Link:  http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1698838/DefinatelyStaying
http://www.fanfiction.net/~fiberkitty
Terms: One co-written 2,500 word story to the highest bidder.

 

 

Save up now, my darling kittens.

Lemons for Lemonade

While I don't have the money to donate, I can give my time and creativity.

As announced on The Fandom Gives Back Blog, there is going to be another author auction.  I am donating some lemon love to it.

What I'm offering/pimping myself for:

Fandom:  Twilight or Southern Vampire Mysteries (aka True Blood) or crossovers. You might even convince me to write some Kelly Armstrong werewolf crossovers with Twilight.

Pairing:  straight, slash, femslash, group

Restrictions: no rape, pedophilia, incest, or bestiality   (were creatures do not count)

Bidding:    10 words per dollar you donate.  No limit.   You can only afford $10?  That's fine. I'll write you a 100 word drabble.  You want to pool your resources with a fic friend and have me write a 10,000 word short story?  Consider it done.  I will write for any and all bids.  This may include new fanfic, outtakes, or continuations. If you want something extremely out of the box, please run it by me first, but it really shouldn't be a problem.

Please check out their blog for continued updates; I will also attempt to update here and on my ff profile page as more information is made available.

In the meantime, the lovely ladies behind TFGB are running a virtual lemonade stand where you can make donations now if you so desire. (These do not count towards the auction, just your own generosity to fighting childhood cancer.)

Let's kick cancer's ass, one lemon at a time.

Much love to you for everything,

kitty

What I'm reading...

If you want to know what I'm reading and highly recommend, I think you should head on over to TwiSlash and check out my Guest Author Rec.

http://twislash.blogspot.com/2009/10/slash-author-guest-rec-fiberkitty.html

Warning, the site is typically not safe for work or kids, but I love it.

Donation Drive Chapter five: A History Lesson

This chapter comes with many thanks to drtammy1511 for offering medical knowledge and also to my ficwife and beta, mischief-maker1, for getting up super early on a Friday morning to proof this before leaving for work.
Previously on Donation Drive
There were hot tears falling onto my face from Jake as he cried. “I didn't want this for you, my love, my only love. I wanted more for you than this life. I'll make it right. I will. I am taking you to Carlisle. He can answer all of your questions.”

---

I reached up to Jake's face, his eyes still closed as tears leaked out the corners, matting his thick lashes. He let out a throaty hum as I stroked my thumbs above his cheeks, wiping away his tears. I had seen him cry before, back when we were together, and even in the days prior to there being an “us,” but I had never seen such a pained look on his face. It was as if his entire world was crumbling around him.
“Jake, why don't you just tell me? You're here, and that way we don't have to disturb Doctor Cullen.”
His eyes opened, the deep brown, almost black, watching me as if he was looking at a stranger. His lips parted and I felt the air move as if he tried to talk, but then Jake made a strangled sound as if choking. He tried again, and then a third time before shaking his head.
“I can't, Bells. I just can't. I'm not allowed to.”
Jake released me and went into the bathroom to wash his face. I looked at my finger, the faint silver line already fading out even further. What the hell was going on in this household? There was so much going on; sex with people they aren't married to, odd food allergies, licking my finger and making the cut vanish, and somehow, Jake and our past is tied up in this.
I felt his eyes on me before I heard the knock. Turning, I was unsurprised to find Carlisle standing at the door, Jasper on his heels.
“Why don't you come with me, Bella? My office will be a comfortable place for this discussion. It is not one I was ready to give to you yet; we had hoped it would never occur, but accidents happen, and now the future has shifted.”
Future?
“You'll understand everything by the time we're done, Bella.” Jasper slid his arm around my waist and began leading me down the hall to the corner office that was seemingly tucked away into the shadows. A great wooden cross hung on the wall and Carlisle reached up, gently running his fingertips over the aged wood.
“That must be very old.”
Carlisle turned to me and nodded briefly. “My best educated guess is the early sixteen-thirties.”
“Wow. How did you find something like that?”
Both men laughed.
“That is part of the story I must tell. Bella, if you'll please come inside. Thank you, Jasper. I will call for you if you are needed.”
Jasper tightened his fingers on my waist. “Alice thinks I should be here for the first part at least. She is just now finishing with making arrangements for our guest and his donor and then has other things to attend to.”
“Donor?”
Carlisle nodded. “All part of the story, Bella. We will get there in time; please come in and we can start at the beginning.”
The dark-paneled room had high ceilings, one entire wall was comprised of windows, and another was floor to ceiling bookshelves. A large mahogany desk dominated the room, a leather chair behind it, as well as two side by side in front. Carlisle indicated I should take a seat and he backed up to his desk, sitting on the edge, feet crossed at the ankle. His loafers looked like something my grandfather would wear, not a young doctor.
“I will start with the cross, as it is part of my story. Please, let me finish speaking, and then I will gladly answer anything you ask. First, are you comfortable? I can adjust the room's temperature if you wish, or get you a drink...” Carlisle trailed off as he indicated a small bar with three crystal decanters with various amber-hued fluids and a tray of glasses.
“I'm not thirsty, but thank you. Please, Carlisle. I just want answers.”
He nodded. “Then you shall have them. I pray, for my family's sake, that you can accept what I tell you. We would hate to lose your friendship.”
Jasper reached over and took my hand into his. “You'll be fine, darlin'.” His touch left me feeling relaxed and content. Being near Jasper was always a joy for he brought such a sense of peace with him.
“The cross belonged to my father.”
"He collected antiques?" I asked.
"No. Bella, you spent a considerable amount of time with the Quileute before, am I correct?” I nodded in response to Carlisle's question. “Do you recall their legends?”
“More or less.”
“The one I'm asking about in particular is that of the cold ones. Do you remember that one?”
“They're the enemies of the Quileute. They said they were blood drinkers.”
Carlisle nodded. “My father carved the cross himself. It hung on the wall above the pulpit in the vicarage where he preached."
My eyes drifted to the hall, and I was fairly certain that my face showed some state of my shock. The cross was over three hundred and seventy years old.
“Bella, I just celebrated my three hundred and sixty-second birthday.”
I felt as if I'd been dunked into the ocean waters near First Beach. The world stopped moving as my attention was solely focused on the blond haired, golden eyed, doctor in front of me, who was either lying or an anomaly.
“I was born in London, as you can most likely tell by the accent which still drifts into my speech from time to time. The best I can guess is that I was born in the sixteen-forties. It was before Cromwell, so I can date myself from that period of time. Even as part of the Anglican Church, we were commoners and did not mark time the same way we do now.”
“I was an only child, from what I can remember, and do not recall my mother. I believe she died giving birth to me. My father believed that evil walked the streets of London. He led witch hunts as well as crusades against those he believed to be werewolves or vampires.”
Carlisle paused, watching my face with intense scrutiny. He turned to Jasper and I felt almost drugged, my body becoming sluggish. “My father became a fanatic, much like your own country dealt with during the Salem witch trials. A lot of innocent people burned as the real creatures, the werewolves and vampires, were much harder to catch, when they made themselves visible at all.”
“On my twenty-third birthday, my father put me in charge of his raids against the evil. He quickly became unhappy with my decisions. I refused to kill humans whose only evil were that of sins against the Church and Holy Word.” I could almost hear the reverence in Carlisle's voice as he spoke of what he obviously held sacred.
“One evening, near dusk, I discovered the true vampires my father sought. They came from the sewers, coming out to hunt.” He paused, his eyes locked on some unseen past. “I drew together a hunting party; and they gathered with their pitchforks and torches. We waited at the entrance to the sewers and eventually, one emerged. His eyes were black, as was his hair, and skin so pale I thought he'd never seen the sun. Even city folk who worked indoors, were not so pale as the creature before us.”
“I heard him cry out in Latin, telling the others it was safe, before the wind shifted and he caught our scent. We chased him through the city, determined to burn his wretched form and save others from his fate.”
Jasper spoke up, his arm moving up to rest on my shoulders, fingers gently massaging my neck.
“Carlisle was a very good runner, with great endurance even then. The vampire attacked Carlisle, biting him. The other hunters attacked the vampire and he left two dead, and made off with a third, but left Carlisle behind, thinking him dead.”
Carlisle nodded and raised a hand to Jasper, silencing him.
“I would be burned so that I could die with my soul intact. However, instinct took over, and I found an open cellar, and crawled into it. I buried myself in a bin full of rotting vegetables so I would not be discovered easily. When the pain started, I bit down on a potato, letting its flesh muffle my cries when I could not swallow them back.”
“In three days, it was over, and as the thirst started, I realized what I had become, a vampire.”
Carlisle took a step forward and I pressed myself back into the chair as he came closer. “I'm not going to hurt you, Bella; I just want to check on your vitals. I don't want you going into shock.”
His cold fingers rested on my forehead and then reached for my wrist, checking my pulse.
"How are you feeling?" Carlisle asked.
"I'm fine," I assured him, my voice sounding weak to my own ears. He turned to Jasper who then nodded in agreement to a silent question.
He's a vampire. I turned from Carlisle to Jasper who looked at me with the same golden eyes, although his had a reddish orange cast along the edges.
“You're vampires?” I didn't know whether to laugh, cry, or run away.
“Yes, we are. Do you remember what else the Quileute legends say about us?”
I struggled to find the right memory of bonfires past. I remembered Jake's warm arms around me, a blanket pulled up over us as he traced circles on my stomach while we listened the stories of their ancestors, the ocean's waves crashing on the shore behind us.
“The treaty?” I fought through a flood of painful memories of hearing about the bonfires from Seth when I'd called to say hello after I'd moved to Florida. “You don't drink from humans.”
“We didn't. We do now, to a degree. Fighting our nature was a dangerous game. We've discovered that when given small amounts of human blood, we are better able to resist its lure. Let me continue with my story so you can better understand what we are, what we have been, and what we are trying to be.”
Carlisle crossed the room and pointed to a painting of London from what must have been his human days. My head began to spin at the thought. Vampires. That meant... Edward was a vampire.
“Yes, Bella, Edward too.” Jasper had moved so that he was squatting in front of me. I didn't realize I'd spoken my thoughts aloud.
“None of us are going to hurt you. You've been here a week and nothin' has happened besides what Emmett did; and sugar, that's mostly my fault. We were sparrin' and I managed to clean take off his arm. He was comin' in to call Leah for an emergency feedin' as he lost so much venom.”
“Venom?”
Carlisle came back to his perch on the desk. “Yes, Bella; we have venom, much like snakes and scorpions. It is what allowed Emmett to heal your finger. It is also what can change a human into one of us. It is also one of the mechanics that allows us to process blood and to heal our own wounds.”
“But what does this have to do with Leah; and I'm assuming you mean Clearwater, Seth's sister?”
They both nodded and Carlisle went behind his desk and sat down in the giant chair.
“When I was first turned, I still held many of my human memories, and luckily something that remained intact when I was changed was my humanity. I loathed what I had become and was determined to destroy myself. I attempted suicide more times than your mind could fathom. I discovered that it is almost impossible to destroy a vampire, despite my desire. In my thoughts, I would prefer to kill myself, and lose my chance at Salvation, than turn to an unlife of destroying God's blessed creatures.”
Carlisle sat perfectly still, his hands now crossed in his lap. It did not seem as if he was even breathing. My eyes drifted to look at Jasper who was still crouched before me.
“Don't look at me like that, Bella. I'm still the same Jasper I was when we stayed up late lookin' at my new shipment of books for my study. Now, I don't have to hide what I am.”
He smiled, his lips parting over sparkling white teeth.
“You don't have fangs?”
The both opened their mouths wide.
“No, Bella. Our teeth are sharper than any blade known to mankind. We do not have most of the Hollywood theatrical physical traits. While some of our ancients are sensitive to the light, the Sun does not harm us, nor do we sleep in coffins, or burst into flame from holy water or garlic.” Carlisle gave a small smile after he finished speaking.
Jasper reached up and turned his hand palm up. “Feel my skin, Bella.”
I shook my head and Jasper reached up and grabbed my hand gently. He rested it on his upturned forearm. The skin was cold, as I'd become accustomed to, but as I'd never been in close contact with one of the Cullens for more than a few minutes, I really touched him. Jasper's arm was smooth as porcelain, and almost as pale, with just a dusting of blond hair on the top of his forearm. The skin itself was hard as rock, it was like polished granite or marble. The longer I rested my hand on Jasper's arm, the more it seemed to almost warm from my touch.
“You really aren't human.”
“No, darlin'. We didn't want to tell you unless we had to. But, there's more to our story, if you are up to hearin' it. You're takin' this remarkably well.”
“I need to hear this.”
Both men nodded, and then Carlisle continued. “I starved myself until I was too weak to move more than a few inches. I had found my way into the forest and was determined to starve myself to death. Now, I don't think that it would be entirely possible, but I might have starved myself into a semblance of a coma until I was fed blood. I was hiding, beneath the boughs of some fallen trees that had formed a lean-to against a cliff face.
“A herd of deer passed by on the way to the river, I think. Their scent, while not as good as that of a human, drew out the monstrous darkness within me, and my strength rallied for one last blow. I lunged at a smaller deer, and drained it dry within moments. I ran for another, and then a third, until I decimated the entire herd.”
“Oh!” I covered my lips as I cried out, thinking of several dead Bambi-like deer with their mothers.
“Bella, haven't you eaten venison before? I know that I did as a human. I found that I could drink the deer blood and avoid killing humans that way. For three centuries, I did not drink from humans. I had exceptional control and had not tasted human blood, but then I took a trip to Italy to see old friends of mine.
“I had spent a considerable amount of time in Italy in my younger vampire days while I studied medicine, art, and any other instruction I could find during the evening hours. I came across others of my kind, much more civilized vampires than those I'd met before. They were still human drinkers, but they had banded together and learned to live within the human community while still separate. I stayed with them for almost two entire centuries. The painting behind you is of my friends and me.”
Jasper went and with reverent hands gently lifted the painting from its hook. “Solimena was greatly inspired by Carlisle's friends. He often painted them as gods, Aro, Marcus, Caius; all creatures I sincerely hope you never have the opportunity to meet.”
Carlisle pointed to the one Jasper had indicated was Aro. “They rule our kind with an iron fist. For millennia, the single rule was secrecy or death. Now, however, that has changed. The Volturi, my friends, discovered a third way, that was neither vegetarian, as I have likened myself, or their human drinking ways.
“While I was in Italy more recently, within the past five years, Aro had everyone in the castle join together at a table set for fifty. A crystal goblet sat at each place, empty when we arrived. After we had all joined, fifty human servants arrived and poured from heated decanters, a few ounces of animal blood into the cups. After which, each used a knife and slit his or her wrist and allowed a small amount to flow into the goblet. The wrist was then offered to the host to close the wound.”
Carlisle closed his eyes as if pained by the memory. “I felt so weak. I could not allow the human to bleed to death, but also knew Aro well enough that he would drain the worker if I refused to heal her. So I licked across her wound, sealing it immediately. I of course, had already changed Edward, Esme, Rosalie, and even Emmett by this time.”
Jasper rubbed my knee and added, “Alice and I came here on our own a few decades ago. But our story is for another day.”
“I drank the offered... wine, if you will, and felt the surge of power go through me. Human blood is infinitely more powerful than that of an animal for giving the vampire body power. It was at that precise moment, I allowed Donation Drive to be born.”
“Donation Drive?”
Both men chuckled and Jasper moved back to his chair.
“Yes, Bella, Donation Drive. It is what we call our home. We run this like a business and we pay our donors. You've met the ones who live on site. We have to move in about two years or we would build a separate dormitory. Our next location will have a separate building for the donors to live in. We are finding that the female donors,” on the last two words he lowered his voice to a whisper, “have a difficulty in remembering their place. Both Jasper and Emmett are married to their mates.”
Memories of seeing Emmett with Jessica, and then of Jake coming back from being with Rose surfaced. “But I thought... Wouldn't it be confusing to them if they are being treated like sex toys?”
Jasper fielded that question. “There are two types of Donors. General donors are called in emergency for direct feeding or arrange to donate via syringe and live off site, for the most part. Sam is a general donor, but he lives on site and he fills our personal blood bank. Yes, Rosalie, Emmett, and even Alice do take physical relief from their donors, but Esme, Carlisle, and myself do not. My heart, body, and soul belong to Alice.”
But all of the flirting he'd done?
Jasper smiled, more of a smirk actually. “I can feel your confusion. I'm guessing it has to do with your first day here and my actions?” After I nodded, he continued, “I enjoy getting a rise out of you; but I would never do anything to harm my relationship with Alice. Now, I do ensure that Charlotte receives pleasure while I feed from her.”
Carlisle looked disapprovingly at Jasper. “That segues into my next topic, Bella, and one that you are most likely particularly interested in as it it involves Jacob. He is, by the way, outside now. Alice and Rose took him out to the guest house so that he would not be part in this conversation.”
“They're drinking his blood?” I hated to think of them biting him.
“Among other things, sugar. They'll keep your boy distracted for a while. Alice will know when they can come back in.”
“How?”
Both men sat back in their chairs. “Not yet, and for that, I must ask all of my children for permission to share as it involves them directly. The bonded donors, like Jake, have signed a contract with one of my children to be a direct source of blood.”
“But the venom...” I trailed off, my mind grasping at a thousand different ways around the venom that would change my still very warm Jake into the walking dead.
“We do not bite our donors, Bella. I do not actually have a bonded donor, so it is probably best for Jasper to explain this part.”
Seemingly effortless, Jasper tugged my chair so that the arms of our chairs were almost sealed together. Faster than my eyes could follow, he grasped my arm and flipped it so that my wrist was up. His fingers gently rubbed over the veins and arteries until I could feel my heart beating in time with his touch. He flashed a rakish smile before kissing my wrist.
“We can't let our venom enter your bloodstream, but we can still drink. Normally, we use a small blade like this one,” Jasper paused and pulled out a small ring with what looked like a razor edge from a cord around his neck, and then ran his finger over my wrist in imitation, “and then we bring the wound to our mouths and drink. Occasionally, we will just use our fingernail, although I prefer the blade. Rose and Alice, I know, use their fingernails.”
I nearly passed out as his lips touched my wrist and he sucked gently. His lips, and the tip of his tongue which flicked across the base of my palm, were ice cold and firm. Lust began to coil through me and Jasper quickly released me. “Even with such a small contact between us, you can see why sexuality is such a strongly ingrained part of feeding. Add to that the sharing of life force, and the intimacy is magnified a thousand fold.”
My body was in a full state of arousal and I was well aware that Jasper at least knew that. His eyes had darkened and he was leaning closer. There was also the tell-tale sign of his denim tenting along the zipper, and it seemed we were both falling under some sort of spell before Carlisle cleared his throat.
“Sorry, it is still a temptation, regardless of my preferences. Bella, I am an empath. I sense emotions quite clearly; I can also manipulate or project feelings and sensations.”
I felt my lust slowly retreat, a sense of calm replacing it. My body ached, yet even that subsided shortly after.
“Better?”
I nodded, worried of what I might say if I opened my mouth. Part of me wanted to flee the room and run up to Edward's and hide beneath a blanket. Another portion wanted to run from here screaming to Charlie and beg him to tell me it was all a nightmare or hoax. But then, there was that smaller part of me, the part that steadily grew larger and stronger, that had already grown to care for the Cullens and wanted to see where I fit into this. I found my voice.
“What about the general donors, like Sam and Leah you said?”
“They have special qualities, as do Jake and Seth, that I am not liberty to discuss with you. Their blood replenishes rapidly and we do not need to monitor their iron count except in crisis situations. If one of us becomes too thirsty, if we have abstained too long or encountered an injury,” Carlisle paused and looked with amusement at Jasper who simply shrugged and gave a sheepish grin, “we will call on Leah or Sam to do a direct feed. Over time, we've found that they are much more resilient and can withstand the fluid loss of a vampire lost in blood-lust.”
“So, it's a Quileute thing?”
Carlisle nodded. “You could put it that way. However, not all of the Quileute have that trait, just the ones we've gathered here and a few we have in reserve for any dire emergencies. They are paid well to be on retainer should we need them.”
I thought back to Jake's friends on the Res. “Paul, Embry, Quil, Jared, Brady, and Collin?”
They both smiled. “You have a rather well developed mind, for a human.”
“To continue, from our normal bonded donors, we take an ounce or two, sometimes three at a time. It is not much, but when mixed with animal blood, it is enough to sate the inner demon we each battle constantly.”
Carlisle got up and went to a locked cabinet. Inside were several bottles of medication of various prescriptions and amounts. Each shelf had a name written on it, and a set of what I'm guessing are color-coded stickers for prescription. Jake, Seth, and Sam had the least with just one bottle; then Lauren and Jessica with a few, but Charlotte had at least seven that I could see in the front.
“Donors have a tendency towards Iron deficiency anemia, so I must place them on a high dose replacement iron therapy. It changes the taste of the blood to a small degree, but it allows our donors to give more often. We try to only feed from the women twice a week each, although Emmett does tend to need more given his body size, and that is why he has two donors. He alternates who he feeds from, but still waits as long as is safe. For every four weeks of donation, the donor must take off four to six weeks to allow the blood supply to replenish properly.”
“How did you get all of this?”
“I'm a medical doctor, and this is a proper business. Outside of that, we have more money than we can spend, so we would be able to obtain this illegally if required. I prefer to do things by the book however. In addition to the daily regimen medications here, I also have a fully equipped medical office downstairs off of the kitchen with a mini laboratory and more emergent treatment methods available. For the donors' safety, I do utilize ProCrit to boost red blood cell production.”
I nodded, the medical information going over my head, yet my worries were put to rest knowing that a doctor was watching out for my friends. Staring at Carlisle, everything began to fall into place.
“We're the same age, physically.”
His eyebrows furrowed as he pursed his lips in thought. “I guess you could say that, although I certainly hope that I look older than my twenty three years or I will have a hard time passing myself off as a physician or instructor for much longer.” Carlisle's lips began to twitch at the corners as he fought back a smile.
The three of us sat in near silence, only the constant thud of my heartbeat and my breathing disturbing the room. It began to grow uncomfortable.
“So, Carlisle, how did you find your donors?”
He opened up a drawer on his desk and pulled out a large file sorter. “After the Volturi discovered the third way, they stopped being so secretive. Their donors family were made aware of the existence of vampires, as were local authorities. Descriptions of rogue vampires, those who still willfully killed their victims, were to be given to the Volturi. Their own hunters would deal with them.”
“Does my father know? He'd asked me if I was a donor.”
“Yes, he does. We informed him and his only reply after the entire story was that he'd prefer any accidents to be properly logged with the police department instead of hidden or made to look like an accident. It is quite a compliment to the character of both you and your father that you are able to maintain such a levelheadedness over the situation.”
I began to fume. Charlie had lied to me!
Jasper used his ability and artificially calmed me. “Woah.” He raised his hands. “Whatever is going through your head should be spoken, not internalized, or it is just going to fester.”
“Charlie lied to me. I asked him what a donor was, and he lied to me. Everyone has been lying to me, including Jake.”
Both men looked at me. “You're more upset about the deception than the truth?”
“I can handle scary things just fine. I can't change the truth, so I have to accept it. What I cannot tolerate is being lied to or manipulated. I do not like decisions being taken away from me. I was lied to and manipulated into coming back to Forks by Jake's father. The more I'm around Jake now, the more it seems that he lied to me in breaking off our engagement. I don't know which side is up anymore.”
“Esme might be of some comfort to you now, if you will allow her to be.” Carlisle's voice was barely audible as he said his wife's name.
Less than two seconds later, her soft knock announced her presence outside the study.
“Come in, honey,” Carlisle called.
Both men stood as she entered and she gave me a hesitant smile. “Hello, Bella.”
I tried to reconcile what I felt for Esme, a daughter's love for a mother, despite how short I've known her, with the fact that she's a vampire. All I could focus on was how warm she makes me feel and the way she has made me feel at home while here. I felt, in that moment, that her presence was a test of my reaction to the entire situation. I stood and as I held out my arms to her for a hug, I expected to watch her take a few steps and then embrace me; instead, she was instantly wrapping me in bands of steel as I was crushed to her chest.
Esme shook from tearless sobs as she held me. “I was worried we were going to lose you, Bella.”
“What would have happened if I had not taken the news well?”
Esme lowered me back down into my chair and moved to stand behind me, her fingers running through my hair in a soothing manner. Carlisle cleared his throat and pushed back a few stray locks of hair from his forehead.
“We're not secret, but we do enjoy our privacy. We limit knowledge to those involved with the program, their families, and the local law enforcement. Money is typically a great motivator for their silence. It was not enough for our first donors who sought us out. Jessica and Lauren had been traveling in Italy shortly after the vampires came out. They met two of the guards and had been so enthralled with the beauty of our kind, that they signed a short term contract that only held for the duration of their stay. When they returned to Forks, they saw similar traits and contacted me at the University. After a few blood tests and explanations, they signed contracts as general donors.”
“After Alice discovered the Quileute resiliency and Jake became a contracted, or bonded, donor for Rosalie and occasionally Alice, the girls moved in as well. Charlotte I found at work, and Jasper signed for her immediately. Do you have any other questions that I may have forgotten?”
All of the vampires visibly shifted their bodies and then paused, looking out the window. Jasper's eyes brightened and he stood, stretching as if to pop his back. He leaned forward and spoke once more, directly to me.
“I'll be right back. If you need me, just call my name, Bella. Any of us can hear you even whisper, so you don't have to worry about repeatin' yourself.”
His eyes had widened slightly on the word whisper and I thought of any whispers I had made. Only one came to mind.
“No.”
He nodded. “I'm afraid so, sugar. We won't tell him, so don't worry yourself about that. Just a warnin' though, Jake's ears are almost as good as ours and I think he heard too.”
I was mortified. My cheeks turned crimson with embarrassment and I bent in half to hide my face as I tried to think of ways I could just kill myself now. Esme rubbed my back, which just made it worse. They had all heard my conversation with Edward, and then heard me masturbating as I thought of him.
“Oh God.” I felt like I was going to throw up.
“What did you do to her?!” The voice was a roar as I heard the front door slam open. Foot steps thundered on the stairs and I heard more than one piece of wood creak from abuse before Edward stood in the doorway, an awe inspiring sight of fury and worry. I looked into his black eyes and shivered.
He moved even faster than Esme and was on his knees before me. Fingers moved clinically over my arms and legs, before moving up to check my face. “You're unharmed?”
I swallowed hard, and then nodded.
“Everyone out.” Edward's voice was like ice yet there was an acidic tone behind the words that left no room for disobedience. “How did you find out?”
I held out the finger I'd cut. Edward's hands were gentle as they cradled my finger. “Emmett?” I nodded. “I wanted to be the one to tell you. I wanted to tell you the truth.”
“I know.” My voice was rough.
His hands trembled as he released my hand and then scooted back to sit against Carlisle's desk, his head thudding back into the wood panel rhythmically. I slid out of my chair so that I was seated cross legged across from him.
“So, you're a vampire.”
His eyebrows raised and he gave a short nod. “You aren't running and screaming.”
“I have a feeling that you could catch me if I was. You're still the same Edward I spoke with last night and this morning; you just have a different diet than I do.”
“But now you know that I want to kill you.”
I pressed my back into the legs and front skirt of the chair, fear finally creeping through me.
“They did not tell you about singers?”
I shook my head.
“My kind have stories that there are humans who smell beyond enticing to us. Your blood sings to me, it calls me with each pump of your heart. I tried resisting it on your first night here, but I had not fed enough and I nearly drank from you there in the kitchen.”
“That's why you left.”
“Yes.” He took a breath. “Please hold still.” Edward moved to the window and opened several small panels, allowing the humid breeze to flow through.
“Thank you. Your fear was increasing your heart rate and the scent was becoming too strong.” This time, he sat down against the wall, staying several feet away.
I looked at him, really looked at him, and allowed myself to notice the inhuman qualities. His skin was too smooth, sculpted to look so perfect. His eyes were turning back to the shimmering topaz and his lips were the dark rose that haunted my mind with thoughts of what it would be like to kiss him. My eyes drifted down his silvery blue dress shirt sleeves to his hands. Each wrist had a glossy black ribbon edged in metallic silver thread.
Edward's eyes followed mine and then he smiled. “Happy birthday, Bella. I told you I would be home.”
His smile was gentle and made my heart break. Tears began to leak down my cheeks.
“How bad is it, really, for you to be near me?”
Edward drew his knees up to his chest, his arms wrapping around them. His delicately sculpted chin rested upon them. He watched me as he considered how to answer.
“Have you ever burned yourself?” He paused, waiting for my response until I nodded. “That first lick of pain is always the most intense because your body then becomes accustomed to the nerve response. While the agony may not subside, the first dose is always the strongest. Being near you is like that. Each time I breathe, my lungs are set aflame and venom pools in my mouth, scalding my throat as I swallow.”
“I'm...”
“Don't apologize. It isn't your fault. I wanted it to be your fault. I wanted to write you off as just a boring human girl, but I couldn't. I tried to stay away from you, but this morning, all you wanted was me. I couldn't ignore your plea; so, I came. It does not make my body's response to you lessen; I still desire to pierce your veins and drown myself in your blood, but I have gorged myself on animal blood while away for these past few days, and I can withstand the burn... for now.”
I hated myself for causing him such pain and selfishly calling him back into the pain. I should leave. I'll go pack, make my apologies and good-byes, and then be on my way to Charlie's until I can save up for my own place.
Edward, who had been looking down at the floor and occasionally towards the door, suddenly turned his full gaze on me. His eyes were open wide as he scrambled to me.
“You can't leave. Please don't leave. I can hunt every day, several times, and it will be fine. Please don't leave, Bella. My family needs you here, I need you here.”
“Why? I'm just a human woman.”
Icy hands cupped my cheeks, the ribbons he wore on his wrists brushed against my collarbones as the breeze from the open windows disturbed the curls.
“You are anything but 'just a human' anything, Isabella. I have heard about you from my family while I was away and then you and I spoke last night. You intrigue me, for far more than your blood. You are bright, have charmed my entire family with your loving heart, have a sense of humor, and your caring nature is what brought you to us. Do not let that push you away.”
I stared into his eyes, the golden hue now as warm as butterscotch as our eyes locked. Edward's thumbs began to slowly move, just the slightest movement as they stroked up and down over my cheekbones. His body jerked slightly as he came closer. I could feel his breath, that honeyed lemonade scent that had permeated the leather couch so completely, fan over my face. My eyes closed unbidden; I wanted to see him but the beauty he portrayed was stunning me.
Edward's lips pressed against my forehead. “I know it is your birthday, but please allow me the gift and do not leave.” His words were a whisper that I felt more than heard as he spoke against my skin.
As he pulled back, my eyes opened, yet I felt as if the world had turned upside down. One thing was crystal clear in my mind; if Edward could make the sacrifice of being near me and being in such pain, I could make one of my own. I lifted my right hand, the one Jasper had not pretended to drink from, and rested it on his own wrist, just inches between our faces.
“Drink from me, Edward. Stop the burn. I'll be your donor if you want. That will help everything, won't it?”
My head hit the ground, bouncing off it as lights flashed in my eyes. Edward was stretched out on top of me, my wrist at his mouth. The chair I'd been sitting in was shoved back against the wall while a rather heavy Edward, much heavier than I'd ever imagined, pressed down on me.
“You want me to drink from you?” The voice was a cruel mimic of Edward's.
I nodded, dumbfounded or even dazzled by his close proximity and the pressure was building between my thighs as his body leaned into me almost rhythmically.
I felt his lips curl in over his teeth and he bit down, tugging at the skin on the side of my wrist beneath my thumb so that he pulled but did not break the tissue. Edward jerked his head back, and I looked into eyes as black as pitch. The hand not holding my wrist slid beneath my back and lifted me up against his chest, only a few inches separating us.
“If you're thirsty, Edward, drink. Let me help you.”
My body fell back as Edward dropped me, jumping away to land in a crouch on Carlisle's desk.
“You don't know what you're offering, Bella. I could kill you. I would never forgive myself.”
“Then give me a contract. If you need my blood, let Carlisle take it safely.” I held out my arm. “I've given blood before. It won't be so bad. Let me do this for you, Edward.”
He slowly climbed down and moved over to me and gently grasped my fingers in his. His head was shaking side to side as he spoke.
“Not tonight, love.” He pressed my hand against my chest. “Think it over for at least one night before signing a contract, before offering me your life. Talk it over with your companion.”
“My companion?”
“With Jake.” His voice sounded almost pained as he spoke Jake's name. “Do not make such a life changing decision without letting him try to dissuade you. Even if you were a donor, you could not feed me, Bella. It would be too dangerous, but thank you.”
He kissed my forehead once more and then was gone, with the slightest billowing of a gray trench coat showing around the corner as he left.

---

Did that go how you expected?
Next chapter, we get to meet James.
The next update may be slightly more than a week away. The babies popped more keys off of my laptop's keyboard and it is currently unusable. Luckily, I had copied this to google docs this morning. I can order a new keyboard next Thursday, but in the meantime, I can write on my desktop or hub's desktop, but they are inconvenient due to the lack of proximity to the babies.
I love you all, but I'm sure as heck not going to edit the 4,000 words of next chapter on my iTouch and add whatever else comes to mind since the original draft written over a year ago. Twitter, the Twilighted Thread, and my blog are all ways to get in touch with me over an anticipated posting date. I will try to keep all of them notified.
Mistress Kitty

TTTB Chapter 8: Awkward Moments

I walked over to Jasper, sitting and taking his hand into my own.
B POV
Jasper emanated mild confusion and surprise simultaneously, perhaps even a little elation at my gesture. Then guilt promptly followed. Edward's melodic voice rang from the kitchen. “We can talk about it later, Jasper.”
He looked at me, so many questions in his eyes. I snuggled into his side, resting my head against his shoulder and watched Emmett play Halo for a while. We sat there, holding hands, and just being with one another, even after Edward came back and sat on my right, my hand snaking into his. The three of us sat there until Emmett gave up playing and sat by my legs, leaning back against me.
“Finally get tired of the computer kicking your ass, big brother?”
In retaliation to my teasing, Emmett slammed his head back onto the couch between my legs so he could look up at me. His grin warmed me as did the sudden pressure of his head against my inner thighs. Thoughts of being with him mingled with the afterglow of Edward's and my night in the cottage, and then I realized that I was allowed to have these thoughts. I'm allowed to think about my brothers that way. Does that make them still my brothers? Yes, they're always that first, at least Emmett is. I think no matter what I'll always be his little sister. But Jasper, I think something more could grow beyond any sex. Oh God. Edward, my Edward, who didn't go beyond first base until our marriage, is letting me sleep with his brothers if it happens. If I could still blush I'd be red down to my toes. Jasper's probably well aware of where my thoughts are. I sighed. All three men looked to me.
“What?”
Edward shot a crooked grin my way, reducing me to a further puddle on the couch. Jasper was amused at the even stronger level of lust I was no doubt subjecting him to, and Emmett began to breathe a little deeper, his head resting inches from where I was aching, leaving it clear that he could smell my arousal. All of their eyes were darker, subtly, but still enough to notice that I was no doubt effecting each of them. Emmett shook his head before leaning forward to wrap his arms around his legs.,
“Emmett, you don't have to mentally beat yourself up, I won't hurt you for thinking like that. Bella is beautiful and I think the three of us in close proximity are giving her similar thoughts. If she'd let me in her head again I would know for sure, but I have a feeling she's going to be quite stubborn about that at the moment.”
I pretended to pick a piece of lint from my leg, amazingly interested in the fabric covering me at the moment.
“I'll take that as a yes, Bella. Based on your breathing and that lovely scent permeating our area of the room I think we all know what you are thinking.”
I stood up, leaving their hands behind me, and went around Emmett, escaping to the kitchen to clear my head and regain control of my body. Edward was right, my mind had drifted to how different Emmett would be in bed. I bet his power as a fighter carries over quite well to him being quite the bear in bed. How Edward expects me to pull off seducing either of them I do not know. I still don't know why he chose me when I was human.
The sound of whispers pulled me from my thoughts, the boys whispering so quietly I could not make out more than that they were speaking at all. I needed outside for a while. Esme had taken Renesmee upstairs to start the homeschooling process. She would need to know so much about both our world and the human world in the next few years before we could send her to school. There would be too many questions if she went now, so school will have to wait but education does not. After cleaning up the dishes and mess from making my daughter some breakfast, I found my feet leading me back to the foyer and slipping my shoes back on when the boys looked up from their discussion, laughter having won out over serious whispers.
“Where are you going, love?” Then I heard a smack and Emmett grumbling. Boys will be boys even when over a hundred years old. I'd best get used to it. I peeked around the corner into the room to see Emmett up between his brothers.
“I think just out for a run. I need to work off some energy and since we know Emmett won't beat me at any wrestling matches for several more months, what is the fun in that?” I smiled to let him know I was just teasing and Edward rolled his eyes at whatever Emmett had been thinking. The doorknob was turning in my hand when I heard footsteps on the basement stairs.
My new father locked eyes with me and then looked to the side room, no doubt asking me to rejoin the family, delaying my escape. I nodded and started turning when I saw all the boys watching me as well. Emmett had taken my spot on the couch but slid back down when I entered the room. Edward's look to me said the same as Carlisle's so I returned to my space on the couch, relieved that a distraction was being offered. Edward slid his arm around my waist, Jasper grabbed my hand and Emmett immediately pressed back against the couch, all shielding me from Marcus.
I think they were worried I'd go after him again. I'd only threatened him once after the capture; even Esme thought he had it coming. He'd commented on Edward finally seeing the light and drinking human blood again in turning me and asked if he was going to hold me to their limited lifestyle or allow me to fully enjoy my thirst and the power human blood grants. I had had a rough day of learning my strength, we'd already gone through two doors and a lamp that morning alone so anyone pissing off Edward was not a good way to keep his or her head attached. Edward's slight growl was enough to have me crouched, teeth bared, before Edward and Carlisle both had to grab me and carry me to Jasper's study to be calmed. They never did ask me to be Marcus's hunting escort after that.
I leaned into Edward but buried my hand on Edward's side into Emmett's curls, letting my nails scratch his scalp, his curls running through my fingers.
Carlisle walked through, escorting Marcus to the main room. Edward stiffened beside me, the arm around me tightening until a slight ache went through my ribcage. I focused on my shield. Love, that's a little too tight. His arm relaxed slightly but he did not move.
“No, not too difficult, Marcus. I appreciate your observation. I hope that your journey home is a pleasant one full of peace.” Edward stopped, snapping his jaw shut, looking to Jasper and me. “As of today, no, but we did speak as you suggested and it was agreed upon. I'd rather that was the end of your thought line if you please. I know that Carlisle has already extended the Cullen family's assistance as desired and I extend that as well, willingly, not just as his son." He paused, listening to Marcus's silent comments. "I would prefer to not separate my family again and wait until our daughter is old enough to hold her own among our kind. I offer my regrets that you won't be able to study the bond between two that are imprinted but you were at least able to see it briefly before, even if you did not completely understand. Perhaps when she is of age we can bring her to wherever you have set up residence, with her mate's approval and presence of course. He's not one to be forced to do anything as my wife can assure you.”
“I assume that if your mate cannot force him, no one can. Your abilities could be useful as I try to create peace in our capital city; please rethink my offer. As you know, the entire family would be welcome within the walls to stay for your duration.” Marcus looked to each of us in attendance, his papery face looking content in comparison to the last time I saw him. Perhaps having his friend's three sons holding me back was leaving him less worried. “Well, we are here to say my farewells. Carlisle has requested a jet to fly me to New York and then my own pilot is meeting me there to fly to Italy. Being alone will be a relief after the years with Aro and Caius. Farewell, Cullen children, may our next meeting, should there be one, be under more pleasant origins.”
We all rose and offered our hands although he was wary of my newborn strength. Once my father and his friend had gone into the garage I sprawled out on the couch, stretching to full length and smiled at the boys, daring them to make me move.
“So, Edward, my love, what does he want from us?” Edward gave me his exasperated look, the one reserved solely for when he doesn't want to answer but knows he has no way around it. I put my arms up over my head to lay them against the the arm rest, smiling in an attempt to dazzle him if I couldn't tempt him to me first. He shook his head laughing, looking to Jasper and Emmett for help. This was not good.

---

Em POV
I wasn't sure what that Dracula wannabe wanted from us but I knew what I wanted from Bella, even though I shouldn't think that way about her. When I leaned back into her I could smell her cunt and that she was wet. I could smell traces of Edward from their playtime last night- hell, I'd heard it from the garage when they were outside in their mini ocean. It made me miss Rosie, everything makes me miss my Rosalie. I won't wallow like Edward did when he thought Bella was gone. Oops. Sorry Edward.
After Jasper's game on the plane left me to soak my pants, while he sat there pretending to not want her, I went to relieve myself a second time before cleaning up. I wish the stewardess could have even gotten my attention- I was a sexual creature long before Carlisle changed me. After so many years with Rose, to now go without was a secondary pain to the loss of my mate, my life, my better half. She always was my better half. Rosie got me in a way no one ever will. But what Edward's proposing? Could I sex Bella up and then send her home to him? He seems to think so and said that Alice was fairly certain after a series of visions.
Edward's such a pansy that I doubt he knows exactly what he's doing to her, although he has had to listen to me and Rose so I guess he couldn't have had a better teacher. My little sister is gorgeous, but she's my little sister. I wonder if I could ever think of her as something else besides Edward's wife or if she could ever think of me as more than just her big brother? Aw man,, that scent. Edward how do you deal, bro? I'd never leave the bedroom. She still smells as good as her blood did but now it's concentrated there just for your enjoyment... or I guess now our enjoyment. Are you sure you can deal with that?
Edward grimaced slightly at my question but continued to sit and talk to Jasper about not spurning Bella's advances if she made one; if we ever thought we would want her that way that she would take the rejection to heart and not make another one. Stupid touchy feely hormonal vampire emo guy. Look at me, I know what you're feeling so I'm a superior being. Yeah well I lost my wife too but you didn't see me fucking my sister in law with energy in the middle of the plane.
Edward cracked a grin over that one. I wonder if Bella can hear him talking to us? She wanted me to take her out bear hunting, I wonder how soon she'd be willing to take a trip. No Eddiekins, to actually hunt, not for that. Well, if she did try and get in my perfectly gentlemanly pants I wouldn't stop her. Don't want to hurt her feelings or anything.
“I didn't know that pants could be gentlemanly, but yours sure could not be described as such.”
Jasper started laughing at Edward, knowing he was responding to my thoughts. Then his eyes snapped to the kitchen and he jerked his head to the side letting us know Bella was trying to listen in, he had been waiting for her to feel confused. Bella walked through the front hall to the shoe rack, it'd be nice if Esme just let us wear shoes in here. I started twitching knowing that Jasper was putting out something- Bella must be really in a moodswing to get him like this. At least once they change they don't PMS anymore.. First we'd get stuck with a week of PMS'ing Bella and then we'd get period Bella. Then a two week break of normalcy. I wonder what her problem is now? Seeing as the all-knowing can't get in her head unless she lets him- just wait till you fuck up dude and she won't let you in her head or her pants. I've got the number for Tiffany's and Chanel on speed dial. I'll hook a brother up with the 'get out of the doghouse' card. Hey!! Instead of a room for the mutt, you should have built him a doghouse with a door flap and all. For once, the stone face lost his composure and cracked up laughing. Jasper looked between us and I repeated my thought which had all three of us laughing when Bella peeked in at us.
“Where are you going, love?”
Love. She has a name, Edward. It's Bella. Behhhh luuuuhh. Try using it. Oh my lovely dearest, let me shower you with roses for eternity while I come up with a new whipped-boy term of endearment daily. Puhleeze. Grow a pair already.
“Ouch!” What's with the hitting? Everyone hits me, I must have a magnet on the back of my head for hands. Edward normally doesn't hit me, that was Ro... umm change your thoughts Emmett. Gotta let go. Those demon things sure were tasty but not worth the effort to catch them. I wonder what they thought of us, we are pretty damn hot.
“I think just out for a run. I need to work off some energy, and since we know Emmett won't beat me at any wrestling matches for several more months, what is the fun in that?”
I couldn't come up with a retort I was willing to follow through the thought process of within a two mile radius of Edward though. Damn, I'm losing my touch. I could think of a lot of fun to have in wrestling with her but was not going to think about that or it would get mighty uncomfortable for me to sit.
Edward's body shifted minutely, barely enough for us to notice, his head cocked to the side as if it would make listening to Carlisle and Marcus easier. I saw them stop at the doorway, both looking at Bella. She had turned to enter ahead of them. Time for me scoot down and let her have her spot back and let me lean against those luscious legs again. Sorry, bro. Couldn't help that one.
I bet she still smells so warm and wet. Oh how I'd love to just bury my head there against her jeans and take in her scent. Time to think about something else, anything else. Don't need anyone to see what these thoughts are doing. Down boy! Ummmmm Carlisle and Esme doing the humpty on the piano. Not working, I've already been up on the piano for that before. Uh oh. Yeah, sorry about that. It was all her idea. We cleaned it after, promise!! Think, gotta think... eating people food. Ewww. Lauren and Jessica without makeup. I felt my body shudder at the thought. Okay, that's working.
We followed Carlisle's previous orders as soon as Bella sat behind me. I felt Edward and Jasper move in on each side and I leaned back trapping her legs against the couch and was prepared to tackle her if need be. Ooh tackling Bella or just restraining her. That could be fun. Bad, Emmett. Edward's going to smack you again or Jasper might if he senses anything. Mmmm. She began scratching my head, that feels good. A slight purr started rumbling in my chest at her touch. She's never done that before. I liked it.
Marcus was looking creepily at the group of us; if vampires could be constipated, he would have been. Then I heard the floorboard bend slightly under Edward's foot. Another rude silent conversation I was being left out of.
“No, not too difficult, Marcus. I appreciate your observation. I hope that your journey home is a pleasant one full of peace.” More staring ensued. “As of today, no, but we did speak as you suggested and it was agreed upon” Oh. They're talking about us getting it on with the new Missus. Got it. Bad move, Marco Polo. “I'd rather that was the end of your thought line if you please. I know that Carlisle has already extended the Cullen family's assistance as desired and I extend that as well, willingly, not just as his son. I would prefer to not separate my family again and wait until our daughter is old enough to hold her own among our kind. I offer my regrets that you won't be able to study the bond between two that are imprinted but you were at least able to see it briefly before even if you did not completely understand. Perhaps when she is of age we can bring her to wherever you have set up residence, with her mate's approval and presence of course. He's not one to be forced to do anything as my wife can assure you.”
They want to let the mongrel go to Italy? Eddiekins, can we leave that flea ridden mutt there? I bet I could make him move. Teach that cocky wolf a thing or two.
“I assume that if your mate cannot force him, no one can. Your abilities could be useful as I try to create peace in our capital city; please rethink my offer. As you know, the entire family would be welcome within the walls to stay for your duration.”
He wants us there? When pigs fly. If they're on a plane, they're flying right? Does that count? Edward what do you think? Do planes count for making pigs fly?
“Well, we are here to say my farewells.”
Farewell, sucker. Wish we'd toasted you when we had the chance. I hope to get the chance to do so in the future.
“Carlisle has requested a jet to fly me to New York and then my own pilot is meeting me there to fly to Italy. Being alone will be a relief after the years with Aro and Caius. Farewell, Cullen children may our next meeting, should there be one, be under more pleasant origins.”
Yeah, killing my wife really endeared you to me. I hope I can rip that smug head from your shoulders. Ass. I stood and offered my hand as Carlisle expected of me. I could at least be polite outwardly even while wanting to rip him limb from limb. Once our goodbyes were made and Dad left for the airport, Bella made herself look even more tempting. She stretched out on the couch, arms up over her head so that her t shirt rode up showing a sliver of sleek skin on her stomach.
“So, Edward, my love, what does he want from us?”
He looked down at her, trying to dazzle before giving up. Then Edward started laughing at her and gave us the look. The one look no man can ignore. I looked to Jasper, he nodded. I looked to Edward and nodded; we accepted his challenge. I grabbed her around the waist, Edward grabbed her arms, and Jasper got her feet. Then we ran to the door and out to the river. She was submerged before she could yell more than “Boys!” to us. We never let her get “stop” out. Yeah we're going to be in so much trouble but it's worth it. Wet t shirt contest anyone? Edward's eyes trailed down her front, observing for himself what he overheard me think.
“I'm not allowed to hit you for that one, with our new understanding but damn when you're right, you're right. Enjoy boys, I'm going to run before she has a chance to catch up. Send me those numbers please.”
Then the pansy took off, not wanting to face the wifey's wrath. Though, I'd have run too, if I had a chance. Jasper just stood there with his arms crossed enjoying the view the water had gifted us and probably gauging her reaction to see if he should start running anyways. When Bella stood, I knew that this was a sign from Rose that all was going to be ok. Rosalie had to know no one would ever take her place in my heart. She's the reason I'm still here and I'll go on living for both of us.
“So Jazz, think we need to run or will we survive?”
A grin spread ear to ear as he slowly stepped back from the bank, taking in all those lovely curves. He hummed as he evaluated her mood. “Mostly shock and amusement, just a little anger. I don't think we need to run but I would back up unless you want to get soaked.”
“Payback's a bitch, brothers.” Venom dripped from her words but I could see the twinkle in her eyes. I did not however watch closely enough, my mind distracted by how little her shirt was hiding, to see her crouch and spring herself at my chest. Jasper yelled for Edward to come watch and took off for the back porch swing. Bella had me pinned as Edward blurred by.
This could be interesting. I twisted my hips tossing her to the side and tried to pin her using force but she was still stronger than me. I had to use brain over brawns unless I could get my full weight on her which I doubted she could move against. Hey bro, a little help here. Distract her or something.
“Bella, can't you at least let him have a chance? Please, for me?”
Oh no, he was turning on the pout and sparkle effect. I swear he should have been an anime character instead of a vampire. What was that one Alice made me watch about the goth girl and the boys? But Bella, she's all vampire princess. I think it's working, she's not using her full strength at least.

---

EPOV
“Please, for me?” I'm sorry, love, I was hitting below the belt but this was a pleasant diversion. Jasper and I sat watching the wrestling match, Jasper's amusement billowing in waves as he snickered at Emmett pinned to the ground by Bella- a third the size of our brother. Jasper's thoughts alternated between jealousy over Emmett's proximity to my wife and berating himself for feeling that way. I pitched my voice low and quiet so the others could not hear.
“I meant what I said, Jasper. I am willing to share her physically and to some degree emotionally. From what I've seen from all of your minds I know that you both want her and I think you may even feel something beyond lust for her. Yes, it's only been a handful of weeks since your loss but with how our bonds are to our mates the time doesn't matter. That pain will not go away, but if we can help distract you from the despair and help bandage the hole that wrenches you apart, we want to. Bella wants to.
"It does not detract from your love of Alice. Remember, she saw this and was not opposed- she's trying to help the only way she can, by leaving notes and setting up situations. Why do you think I had already set out a white tshirt and jeans for Bella this morning after her shower? Alice has left me a daily journal of sorts, it was tucked under Nessie's crib where I found it as I dismantled it to move in the new bed. She left notes about the days she had seen visions of. She claimed it was easier than trying to see where to leave me so many notes. One day has a mention that she was certain you thought she was nuts writing in her journal while resting after dinner with Nahuel, pleading your case for him to come back home with you. She said that she had gotten to the house, placing notes as needed while you and the guests circled the area to find the best entry. I can feel the jealousy eating at you- your thoughts and emotions betray what you are desperately trying to hide from me.”
How are you dealing with this? Truly.
“It is difficult and I know you can sense my own inner battle to allow the match to continue when we all know where this will end up. I know that neither of you will hurt her but above all I want our family to stay together. This is the one thing we can offer in exchange for the sacrifice you both must endure. Enough of this, we will end up just talking in circles. How long do you think it will be before she lets him win to stop the pouting?”
“I don't know if she'll throw the match. She's rather determined at the moment. I could toss some random bursts at them to see what happens when they are distracted.”
I nodded to the tactical genius I was proud to call my brother. He began alternating glee, sadness, amusement, determination, and anger; never in the same order and in intervals they could not anticipate. Bella was beginning to wear down, her mental focus tiring under the onslaught of emotions and the playful battle she was part of. Emmett's thoughts were less than pure, especially when he had Bella on her back and he was settled between her legs, attempting to use his entire body in the pin so she couldn't shove him aside.
Her breath caught as he pushed against against her, his thoughts screaming in my head. She's so small, I feel like she's a ragdoll to be tossed around. If only there weren't clothes in the way. I wished that Jasper would speak and pull me from my silent place having to view the images they both had of the scene- Emmett of he and Bella in the throws of passion there in the grass, Jasper of he and Bella up on the mountain under the stars and if she hadn't stopped him from kissing her.
Bella twisted her legs to the side throwing Emmett onto his back again while she sat on his chest. I felt my body responding to the images although I knew it wasn't from the image themselves but from Jasper inadvertently releasing his talent through the air. The area around us was so heavy with lust I couldn't get anything through my head but the need to take Bella. I growled a low warning to him to get himself under control, breaking the thrall we both had, but not before the wrestling in front of us took a different tone. They both were breathing heavy and arching against one another as the wrestling match became a fight for dominance. Bella's nipples were pressed against the fabric of her wet shirt as her body responded to the frigid temperatures as if she were still human. A sense of modesty came over her and she swept one arm across her chest in an attempt to hide her hardened buds from view. He used her distraction to flip her onto her back and press his hips between her legs so she couldn't fight back.
Edward, I hope you were serious earlier.
Then I saw his thoughts, his focus on her lips and thinking of kissing her. My hands clenched around the chair arms but I forced myself to stay still. Jasper sensed my anxiety and did his best to calm me, and then it happened, Emmett leaned in and kissed her, one hand wrapping around her back.

TTTB Chapter 7: Home

EPOV
“Carlisle, I think we can let him into the main house. He hasn't tried anything and his thoughts are harmless to us. He thinks only of going home or of killing himself, no other options seem to visit his mind. Only the final moments of his wife and his constant annoyance to me are shared.”
Carlisle finally lifted his butterscotch eyes and looked at me. What has Marcus been saying, or rather thinking, that has you so uptight? For you to admit annoyance, it must be a fairly large ordeal.
“He has a somewhat odd thought of what will occur when Bella returns home with Renesmee and your other sons. Alice apparently had similar plans that she's trying to put into motion. I really need to talk to Bella when we get her home tonight.”
I'm glad to see that the two of you have survived these six days. You have been much easier to live with than the last time you were separated. You've grown as a couple, and as individuals. The two of you are stronger for each other, and she has brought out the best in you- you've blossomed into the boy I saw on that bed- life shines in your eyes again- and I think fatherhood agrees with you. How many presents is Nessie coming home to?
“I redid her bedroom with Mom's help and after speaking to Nessie on Tuesday, I filled her bookshelves, toy bins, and closets with her wish list as well as a few extras.”
Carlisle patted me on the back before motioning me towards the foyer. “My shift will not be over until after they are home, so unless we leave Marcus without a guard and you take Esme, you'll have to take the Jeep, it's the only vehicle that can seat all of you.” He tried to stifle a smile before tossing me the keys to Emmett's over-sized toy. My groan echoed through the hallway. “I know you've been counting down the hours, so you are well aware of the three hours before you take off. Why don't you spend them with your mother? I know she'd love the company.”
I nodded and headed towards the door so I could head to the garden. “Thanks, Carlisle.”
You are welcome, Son. Go on. I'm going to get changed and head to the hospital. Give Nessie a kiss for me and let her know I'll be home as soon as I can. His thoughts swirled from having his family as complete as possible, to patients he had scheduled visits with, and then to any ER arrivals.
I closed the door quietly behind me and wandered the sidewalk around the house to our garden. I found Esme easily, her straw hat, apron, and gloves lending a human touch to the vampire weeding a flower bed. Her thoughts reached to me when she heard my approach. Edward! His smile is slowly returning now that his family is getting closer.
“Hello, Son. What brings you out into the garden? There aren't any flowers currently, just tons of weeds that grew while we were busy. The rowan tree is starting to get berries but that's it for color right now in the garden.” I wish I had beautiful flowers to send to the airport with you. Her words were punctuated with frustrated breaths as she yanked handful by handful of weeds from the flower bed, once again restoring order to her domain. She looked up and smiled as we heard the Mercedes pull out of the garage. We turned and saw Carlisle blow a kiss towards Esme and whisper, “I love you.” It was now or never.
“Esme. Mom, can I talk to you about something?”
Always honey. You know that. She stopped weeding and sat back on her knees. I held out my hand to help her to her feet. The frost covered grass cracked beneath our footsteps as I led her to the stone bench on the side patio.
“I'm really confused of what I need to do, as well as want to do. Everything was so crystal clear before, but talking to Marcus and then Alice's letters started showing up, and now it feels like I'm in a maze with only one possible ending but so many ways of getting there. I'm worried if I choose wrongly that we'll lose everything.”
What is going on Edward? Tell me and we'll sort things out.
I smiled at my mother, truly my mother in every sense. “I love Bella more than anything. She's my everything; she completes me, makes me be a better man, less of a monster. She taught me how to love and live; she gave up her humanity to have an eternity with me, to give us a daughter. She's my soul mate.”
Esme nodded, a smile across her face. And I'm thankful for every moment you are together. She makes you live, not just exist. “She's my daughter, your wife, and an amazing mother.” I only wish that Rose and Alice were still here. It isn't fair that one son finally finds his match and two lose theirs. Our family was complete for too short a time.
“That is what I want to talk about. Alice had a vision, or rather, several of them I'm guessing, on how to hold the family together. Marcus has seen it for a while with his gift as well. His thoughts taunt me whenever he knows I'm listening. But it's Alice's letters that have made me even consider his option.” My hands gripped my knees tightly, worried if I grabbed the bench seat I'd have only a pile of gravel to sit upon.
What do they see happening Edward? Her voice rang with her concern now, her maternal urge to comfort her child taking over completely.
“They want me to share Bella with Jasper and Emmett.”
Share? What does he mean? “How? What do they mean by share?” Does it mean what I think it means? Her thoughts were overtaken with images of Bella laying in bed next to my brothers.
“Yes, Esme, that's exactly what they mean.”
Oh.
“Alice admitted to me in a letter of throwing Bella and Jasper into situations while they're away. She wanted this. She knew that Bella could keep them from hurting as badly. Alice is using Bella and I as pawns in her eternal game. She's determined to have her way and based on how Bella has sounded on the phone, I'm sure that there has been an event or two where Alice tried to get her point across to them as well as to myself.”
What are you going to do about it? She thought to me as her toes toyed with a piece of rock that was too far from its flower bed.
“That's the problem. I don't know. I keep coming back to knowing that if Bella wanted them, I wouldn't stop her. I don't know if I could truly say ever that I want to share her. She's mine. She's my mate, my everything. But they're our brothers, family. I just want everyone to have a happily ever after, and theirs was ripped away from them. I feel selfish. If I could just share her, maybe she could help even more, keep them from feeling as I did when I just thought she was dead. To see her die before my own eyes, I know I wouldn't have the strength they do now to go on, even for Renesmee. Without Bella, there is no reason for me to exist.”
“Son, I think that the fact you are even considering the option,” her voice cracked a bit on the last word, “speaks volumes of your love for your family. Over my years as a human and as well, one of us, I've discovered that there are many forms of love, some less than innocent, and some that are so pure that they consume one another with a white fire. You and Bella have that- a love so pure and strong that it holds you together but when apart it slowly consumes you. But the heart, or whatever it is that allows us to love, our humanity perhaps, is infinite. Love is infinite. When your daughter was born, you loved her right away, yes?” I nodded. Even hearing her thoughts echo her words as she spoke them I could not see exactly where she was going with this.
“It didn't detract from your love of Bella, in fact, it made you love her more.” My head bobbed again. Esme was correct; my love for Bella knows no bounds and my heart swelled with love, adoration, and pride at what she and I had made- a child when I thought that path was barred to me.
“Edward, we both know that you and Bella loved your sisters dearly. You also both love your brothers. You're family. We take care of one another. That's what sets us apart from the covens. We are a family. One unit comprised of seven individuals, eight including Jacob who may as well be counted now since he will be a part of the family.”
Sorry flew across her thoughts and face as I winced at my less than favorite thought. “Carlisle and I lost two daughters, and we're still grieving that loss. I'm a mother, that loss cripples me at times. A parent is not supposed to bury her children. I cling to Bella now; she's my only daughter left. If I lost her-lost any more of my children, the grief would be too much. I want my sons back. I know they are heart broken, no... they are soul broken; and if Alice saw it help, maybe it is the right thing. I think the Cullen family has long since learned to never bet against your pixie of a sister. Am I right?” I smiled. The same thought had often crossed my mind.
“I don't know how I'd deal with seeing them together.”
“Then don't. If Bella can accept this, arrangement, well then the two of you would have a lot to discuss, including some set of boundaries and rules I'm guessing. Include that it has to be out of thought range and you'd appreciate if they guarded those memories around you until things were more easily accepted. They love you. They'd never do anything to hurt you. Emmett and Jasper are men, with the appetites of men, but they also recognize that she is yours and would see that you are offering quite the gift in sharing her affections, even if it was solely physical and she never developed feelings beyond sisterly for them.
"There are alternate relationships out in the world, Edward. A polyamorous relationship, done right with open communication, complete honesty, and done with love, can be successful. It does not take away the love from the first relationship but adds a new depth as you discover how you feel about others. It is not the relationship I currently share with your father, and is not the right choice for us, but many find that it works. I know our Alaska cousins had practiced forms of it from time to time as male vampires found their way to the coven for an extended trip. They shared equally although there normally was a primary relationship, one he was closer with. Change is so hard for our kind, especially where mates are involved, but perhaps this is the happily ever after for the family. Ask Bella what she wants but above all, be honest with her and yourself.” Esme wrapped her arms around me and made me feel like that seventeen year old boy I was so long ago, held in his mother's arms as she made the world right again.

---

BPOV
The plane landed and I could see Edward's fiery hair waiting at the terminal as soon as I stepped onto the concourse. Jake had Renesmee so I knew I could go on ahead. I could see Edward trying to hold still and not jump the fence and run towards me. I started jogging to him, every inch too far away from my love. As soon as I cleared the desk and attendant he had me in his arms. Our lips crashed together, my arms snaking up his back to let my hands tangle in his hair. He pulled back, panting, and looked into my eyes, our foreheads resting together.
“I missed you, love," I whispered as I drew his face to mine for another kiss.
“I missed you, my Bella. Let's not do this again; I can't bear being parted from you.”
He pulled away and took our daughter into his arms as soon as Jake had led her through the gate. “My little one. How glad I am to have you back in my arms. Home. You're finally home.” Her hands were on his face, love for her father clearly written across hers, and his smile was, I guess, triumphant is what I'm looking for. It was infectious. My vision began to blur and then I felt the fire as tears ran down my cheeks at their reunion. Edward hoisted Renesmee onto his hip and pulled me close with his other arm. “My two loves.” My head resting on his shoulder I saw our brothers approach. Jasper, having seen and felt my tears, reached over and brushed them away. “Jasper. Emmett. Thanks for bringing them home. Jacob, you kept her safe and I am eternally in your debt.”
Jake, being Jake of course, couldn't resist a barb when given the chance. “Thanks aren't needed. You know why I did it, there's nothing for me without her. But I'll remind you of your debt, as you put it, when you threaten me in say seven or eight years when I ask your permission.”
“Don't push your luck, mutt” A low growl had started in Edward's chest before Jacob finished speaking.
“Jacob Black!”
“Watch it, pup”
“Jake”
“Jakey. That's not the way to make my father like you. Can't you two get along?” It was the last voice in our outburst that brought us to our senses. Renesmee doesn't like to speak aloud often; but when she does, she gets her point across.
I smiled at my little girl. “Come on boys, let's go home. We have eternity to fight out your testosterone battles, let's just go home now before people start staring more than normal.”
The ride home was silent, Jake and Renesmee in the middle seat, Jasper riding shotgun, Edward and I on the back bench. Renesmee hand her hand on Jake's cheek almost the entire time, chuckles escaping his lips occasionally. Their dependency on one another had grown in their month away together which left me both relieved knowing she'd been taken care of so well and jealous that my little girl was already beyond needing me. Emmett was bouncing in the driver's seat of his jeep, happy to be up in his baby again.
I was in my love's arms, as if we had not been apart. Edward's arm was around my shoulder, fingers stroking the side of my neck, drifting up from time to time to gently worry my earlobe or trace across my lips. My hand was on his leg, tracing circles on his thigh. Once I may have gone a little too high in my circle and Edward let out a content yet strained sigh causing both of my brothers looked at us- Emmett through the mirror and Jasper turning to look between the seats. Edward looked questioningly at my brothers and then to me, as if trying to figure out what had happened while we were away. I just shrugged and nestled into his shoulder, tucking my head under his chin. He smiled into my hair and softly hummed my lullaby. I sat there, content, until Emmett pulled into the driveway and I saw Esme standing in the doorway.

---

Jasper POV
I still don't know if what Alice has seen is the right way for things to progress but what is growing between Bella and myself is too strong to deny as just curiosity and comforting. It doesn't near what I felt for Alice or the love I see between Bella and Edward, but there is something there- an attraction, the lust boils between us when we're alone, and a trace of love is strengthening, more than what we had before, less innocent when combined with the lust, but I know we'll never be mates in the true sense of the couldn't be, right?
If Edward and Bella come to an understanding on things and do allow the physical to occur eventually, we could be amazingly mated, but she'll never be my mate. That part of me belongs solely to Alice, as Emmett will always belong to Rosalie, and Edward and Bella belong to each other. But when Bella is with me, it's as if I can feel Alice when I'm in her arms. I can remember her scent that little bit more, as if she's watching over us. Until a decision is reached, it is torture watching my thoughts, always having the main area of my mind focused on Alice, my history, philosophy books I want to read, anything but the thought of his wife on top of me, riding against my cock.. ok got to stop that thought Jasper, Alice riding me.
I heard Edward sigh and the slight building of lust coming from the backseat. Emmett looked in the mirror, jealousy that Bella's hands were on Edward. He, too, was beginning to feel for our little sister. I did my best to keep my thoughts and emotions in check but my body disobeyed and I found myself turning to look at the maker of the sound, his eyes full of curiosity at our reactions, trying to find the thought that would reason away our behavior. I saw Bella's eyes widen before shrugging at him as he looked to her for the answer. She felt a slight amount of guilt as she looked at him but then I could feel her eyes on me as she snuggled into his chest, affection, understanding, guilt, and need pouring from her- willing me to understand that she was sorry for what I was being put through. I turned to face the front again, watching out the window. Oh, it will be hard to deal with keeping my thoughts and emotions buffered.

---

BPOV
We were home at last. Hours later found us in our cottage; Renesmee was asleep in her bed, and Jake had gone home to see Billy and let Charlie know we're home and will be by tomorrow. Edward had taken me out to hunt; a mountain lion crossed our path. I tried to entice my husband in the woods after he licked my chin and lips clean of blood that had smeared. He pulled me towards our home, wanting me in his arms in our bed. Little did he know I was going to have no part in the gentle sweet love making we were used to. This was going to be an evening he'd never forget, vampire memory or not.
After checking on Renesmee, I made my invitation. “Edward, join me in the shower?”
He smiled and nodded, picked me up into his arms, and then carried me into the bathroom. He reached in and started the taps. I watched the muscles in his back stretch and flex as he moved, wetness pooling between my legs. I slowly pulled off my sweater, and lowered the zipper on my slacks, as he turned to look at me. When I stood before him in a cream lace bra and panty set, he dropped to his knees, his face against my stomach. He growled deeply against my skin, reaching up and tearing my bra off into pieces, not bothering to find the catch on the back. Edward traced his hands down my sides to my hips, whispering my name into my flesh, as his fingers caught on the waistband of my underwear, sliding them down to my feet. I stepped out of them, backing into the shower. He rid himself of his pants, and was already erect, pulsing for me. Edward took a step over the ledge into the shower where I surprised him. I reached down, tracing his cock with my fingertips, before closing my hand around his hard length, stroking from base to tip. His eyes rolled back in his head and a genuine purr began at the back of his throat. I began to stroke repeatedly, letting my thumb trace across the venom leaking from the tip of his shaft. His eyes flew open and he looked at me in awe.
I knelt down before him, sending him images of what I wanted to do, the same scene I sent him before I left. Edward let out a strangled moan, his engorged member twitching towards me. His hand slipped beneath my chin, tilting me up to look at him. “You don't need to do this, love.”
But I want to Edward; please let me. Besides, your friend here thinks that I do.
“It isn't proper.”
In your time it wasn't. I'm your wife, anything I choose to do is proper. Please, Edward? On my last “please” I didn't wait for his answer and let my tongue slip from tip to base and back again. He leaned back against the wall as I opened my lips and took him in as far as I could, my hand wrapped around his base.
Edward whimpered, his hands going into my hair, stroking my ears, and gently rocking my head against him. “Bella. I still don't think...”
Don't think. Just feel me. I let my tongue snake around his cock as I let him thrust between my lips. I took him a little deeper, swallowing to create pressure.
“Oh God, love. What are you doing to me?”
Probably what you think I am. Do you like it?
His response was a moan as I felt the head of his shaft swell. He started panting and thrusting deeper. When his fingers tightened in my hair, pulling me onto him I chanced looking up through my lashes, his face was twisted into a snarl as he growled. He was fighting his impending release, his gentleman side at war with the seventeen year old boy who wanted nothing more than to fill my mouth with his seed. It was time to push him over the edge. Cum for me Edward. Let go.
His eyes opened, his mouth half smile and half sneer as he threw his head back against the shower wall, a dent forming from the impact. I moved my head faster, mimicking the motions our bodies made together and then he let out a moan so loud I was worried the main house could hear us. Edward's hips snapped against me and his venom spilled into my mouth, which I swallowed down as he came. His hands finally stilled against my head, now pulling me off of him as his cock began to soften. I let him go with a pop of my lips and he bucked once as the air hit him. I stood up and he looked at me in wonder before closing the distance to kiss me. We finished showering together, washing one another's hair and bodies, never letting go.
After he dried me off, Edward finally spoke. “Bella, love, where did you learn that?”
Learn what, dear? An insolent smile graced my lips.
“You know fully well what. You on your knees, pleasuring me. How? Where did you learn that?” His eyes were guarded as if not sure he wanted the answer.
“Edward, you are the only person I've done that to. We had a long flight, a few of them actually, and the boys bought some magazines to help pass the time. I filed some information away for later.” I stood on tiptoes, looping my hands around his neck and pressing my lips against his. I still marvel at how he feels soft, warm, like myself now that I'm no longer human. His lips are no longer hard and cold but soft and mold to mine so well. We headed towards our bedroom, stopping to peek in on a still soundly sleeping Renesmee. I walked to the door leading towards our pond and patio as he went for the closet. He must have seen me looking out wistfully as he left his clothes on the bed and came to wrap his arms around me, resting his chin on top of my head.
“Isabella. We still have a few hours before Nessie wakes up, want to go for a swim and you can tell me more about your trip?” He reached around me, letting the latch loose before grasping me by the hip, spinning me to face him. I looped my arms around his neck as he reached down and grabbed my thighs, pulling me up so that I could wrap my legs around him. He left his towel on the floor and undid the knot on mine, letting it slip from me onto the soft sand surrounding the man made pond. He stepped down into the pond, taking us to the deep side of the pool, and he stood with his leg bent, braced against one of the hidden seats along the edge. I slid down his body, my core hitting his thigh as my legs fell to either side. The pressure caused me to moan, my desire still rampant for him.
“Edward, please. I need you. I've missed you being inside of me.”
He looked at me wickedly, before lowering me down his body until I could touch the bottom. He placed his hands on my shoulders, his fingers running down my arms, electricity burning through me wherever he touched.
“Turn about is fair play, my Bella.” His fingers slipped from my hands to my hips, one going to my back to hold me against him, the other stroking my sex, his fingers sliding between the lips before he used that hand to position me so that his hardness was against my opening. His fingers pressed against my clitoris as he entered me. I clutched at his back as his fingers circled the bundle of nerves, his body starting the maddening rhythm that leads to our mutual release.
Edward, please more. Harder. My mental conversation was easier to portray what I wanted than to speak it aloud. He reached down with his free hand, hitching my leg up over his hip, I brought the other leg up, the water making the position easier. He sunk down to his knees, the water coming to my chin, my hair trailing out behind me. I grasped his shoulders, pulling myself up before sinking back down onto him as he groaned into my neck, his tongue tracing the scar he'd placed there. The sensation startled me, so much more sensitive than any other spot on my neck. I bucked against him, earning a deep growl as his lips took possession of mine again. I could feel my orgasm building as he continued to thrust into me and work his fingers against me. I buried my face in his neck, turning to kiss his shoulder as the pleasure overtook me, a scream escaping me until I inadvertently buried my teeth in his shoulder. He hissed and I felt him pump his own release deep inside me.
He chuckled as I lowered my legs and knelt beside him. He had reached up and was rubbing my bite.
Oh god, Edward. I'm sorry! How bad is it? “How bad does it hurt Edward? Tell me!”
He just laughed and kept rubbing the spot. “It's fine Bella. Love, I'll be fine. It stings a little but not as bad as I'd think, probably because it's partially my own venom that flows through you. It's still going to leave a mark- a little stronger than a hickey don't you think? If you were planning to mark me as your own, you've done it, my wife.”
He was teasing me after I'd bitten him!
I splashed him with water and then started to climb out of the pond. He pulled me back in and I let him win; a kiss was my prize for humoring him. Edward lifted me in his arms and carried me to our bed where we laid down, still wet, and he draped an arm over me, his lips on my forehead. I thought back to all the nights I'd slept in his arms and how loved and safe I feel here. I looked at the mark on his shoulder, the crescent that was already turning silver. I traced it, and wondered if that's what Jasper felt like.
“So, Bella, how was your trip? I picked up from Jasper that you went with him to scatter Alice's ashes.”
I shifted so that I was laying on his chest, my ear over where his heart used to beat.
“It was beautiful but I'm so glad to be home. Emmett made bad jokes as always, Jasper enjoyed playing games with his talent, and then after we found Renesmee and Jacob, we spent time shopping and relaxing in town. The night Jasper took the urn up to the mountain top, he asked me to go with, at Alice's request. She also had me bring a blanket so we laid down and watched the stars before he said good-bye. I felt like I was helping him by being there. Alice seemed to know I could help him, so she found ways for us to connect.. The mountainside, hunting one night with Renesmee while Jake and Emmett went in town to gamble a bit, even his game on the...” I stopped there, not wanting to continue.
“Game? What game?”
On the plane, love. I told you about it, a game of resist the emotion.
“Yes you did, love. So why are you tense from talking about it? Did you not enjoy it? What happened? Did he hurt you?” His arms tensed as if to run.
“No, Edward, it was fine, just well, Wait... promise not to move until I'm done talking, okay?” His eyes widened and he nodded. I sat, straddling him. “Here, love, this might be easier. Just remember that I love you, always.” I showed him the images of the three of us on the plane, from start to finish, including me sitting in a similar position on top of my blond brother, the starry night, the almost kiss, me stopping it saying I can't do this, our discussion of what Alice wants, Jasper saying he wants me but won't interfere with Edward and me. I stopped and showed him how beautiful he looked as I jumped into his arms at the airport. I love you more than life, more than existence, Edward. I am yours, always.
His eyes were slightly pained at seeing the intimate position of me on his brother, but he smiled through the rest. “Yes, Bella, Alice is up to something, and is apparently playing harder than I anticipated. That's part of what I wanted to talk to you about. I don't really know how to go about it but it seems that you and Jasper came to the same conclusion. Alice saw you with Emmett and Jasper, as well as me, all of us sharing you.”
Hearing him say it so matter-of-factly, scared me slightly. I started to climb off of him to sit beside him.
“No, Bella; stay, love.” His hands tightened around my hips, holding me in place. “We need to talk this through, and this is as good of a position as any.” He smiled then, trying to dazzle me. “Unless you prefer it to be Jasper beneath you.” My look of shock made him laugh. “Oh, my Bella! I'm teasing you, dearest. I know, love, I know you. You love me and are mine as much as I am yours. But it is good to know that you are attracted to him, I'm glad you were honest with me. As much as it does make me jealous to think of you like that with him, or even with Emmett, I think that Alice and Marcus may be right. My brothers love you, Jasper a little more so based on the time you've spent together. You are binding us together, maybe it's just that we need to make that knot a little tighter. I was talking to Esme earlier...”
Esme knows!?
“It's okay Bella. Don't fret so much. This family has no secrets, you know that. With our hearing, someone was bound to find out what we are discussing. But she and I discussed how love works and that if you love them it doesn't mean you love me less and that there are relationships with more than two partners that work. The foundation is love and honesty, two things we already have shown here to be in our favor.” He went back to stroking my hips and arms gently as he spoke when he knew I wasn't going to bolt.
“So where does that leave us, Edward? What do you want me to do?” I placed my hands on his chest and shifted my weight so I could settle next to him, and pulled him onto his side so we were looking into each other's eyes.
“It isn't what I want you to do, it's what we choose to do as a couple. You are my wife, but they are also my brothers. I want to help them heal in any way I can. I know what it felt like when I thought you were dead. But for them to watch their mates fall like that, in front of them and be able to do nothing, especially Jasper after finding out that Alice knew she wouldn't walk away from that encounter, I want to help erase their pain. For everything Alice has done for us, the sacrifice she made, for the sacrifice our family made to keep us together, I want to at least give you and them the option, to try and heal their wounds a bit.”
“Does this mean you're alright with me being, well, intimate with them?” Edward reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a ragged breath. I regretted the question. I tried to reach out for his face. He grabbed my hand and kissed it. “I'm sorry, Edward, I shouldn't have asked.”
“No! It will be fine. It's a question that had to be asked. I honestly don't know yet. Will I allow it, yes. Will I hold it against you, no. Will I be jealous, yes but I will learn to deal with that. I know that you won't run off with Jasper, and Emmett won't kidnap you for more than a weekend away. I am not personally against it beyond my caveman tendencies to claim you as mine and no one else's. It just goes against everything I was raised to believe in. But then I became a vampire and spent more than a human lifetime waiting for you to be born. After, we fought against all odds to be here in this bed together, our daughter behind us, and now we have another path set before us... It isn't a hurdle or an obstacle, just a different path where I won't be the only one holding your hand.”
“How will we broach this with them? I can't just walk up to them and ask them to sleep with me.”
Edward started laughing. “You probably could just ask Emmett that.” I hit him on the shoulder and he winced. “Save that for Emmett. He likes it rough.”
I buried my face in the pillow. Of anyone, Edward would know what his brothers like, despite years of tuning it out. I started laughing against his chest and he wrapped his arms around me.
“Love, at any time, if you agree to this, you can call it off. Other than keeping it equal between the two of them and not forgetting about me, there really aren't any rules to go from. We're in new territory without a guidebook. All we can do is be honest and let the cards fall as they will, or in this case, how Alice wills it, and see what happens. We won't force things to occur, but we will not stop any natural progressions either. Is this something you can do, are willing to do? I love you no matter your answer.”
I just looked into his eyes and he smiled that crooked smile that is meant just for me. I could feel him dazzling me but did not care. He was mine and loved me, that was all that made sense in the world. I did not think I could actually speak the answer, my throat felt thick with tears, so I simply nodded before kissing him and laying down in his arms.
We stayed like that until the sun rose up over the trees and our daughter began to stir in her room. We walked up to the big house to see Carlisle on the phone helping make arrangements for Marcus's return flight to Italy while Marcus sat in a high backed chair in the dining room, drinking a glass of what I'm assuming was donated blood much as they had given me while pregnant. The smell was rich and inviting but I tuned it out, focused on Jasper sitting on the couch. Edward looked to me, nodding and gave me a small push as he went to see if Carlisle needed any assistance. I walked over to Jasper, sitting and taking his hand into my own.